Murasaki
by Jollyolly
Summary: A retelling of how Tsuzuki struggled with his growing desires for Muraki. Will he willingly put aside fears and doubt to be true to himself? A Mur/Tsu fic.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own Yami no Matsuei. Why is that?!

A/N: Sometime ago I had written a story about how these two came together for the first time. However, this idea popped in my head. It's a different take on how Tsuzuki decided to be with Muraki. Enjoy!

* * *

The smaller man let out a contented sigh and tightened his hold around his lover's neck. Turning his head and unable to resist, Tsuzuki nibbled along the smooth white neck, right along that throbbing pulse point.

Muraki's chest rumbled a deep throaty growl, a pale hand gliding up his lover's smooth back, fingers playing against the nape of the smaller man's neck.

Tsuzuki laughed since he was quite ticklish there, and bit the alabaster neck in retaliation only to yelp in surprise when his rump was squeezed hard.

"Kazutaka! Th-that was uncalled for!" he exclaimed, trying to keep a straight face. Impossible as his lover's fingers were now kneading a pert ass cheek. "Ka-kazutaka! St-stop! Stop it...right now!"

Tsuzuki struggled to catch his breath between his fits of laughter. However, before he could escape his lover's clutches, Muraki, sporting a huge grin, squeezed the brunette's wiggling body to him, his fingers really going to work on that rounded bottom.

"You're not getting away, Asato. It's useless to even think so, so you can just give up right now," the doctor declared, highly amused, loving how the brunette was in such a playful mood and losing himself in the moment.

"Never! I'll never...give up! Not...*chortle*...not when I have you...*snicker*...have you at MY mercy!!" Tsuzuki's legs collasped beneath him causing both men to tumble from the couch onto the thick carpet. But now the guardian was deftly pinned underneath his larger lover.

Realizing his predicament, Tsuzuki blinked, his bravado punctured.

"Oops."

Silence.

Then an explosion of laughter filled the room. Muraki lifted himself up, straddling the guardian, his whole body shaking from fits of mirth. Tsuzuki joined him in that, laughing up a storm himself. After a time, Muraki wiped at his eyes, shaking his head, silver bangs brushing over bright eyes.

"Believe it or not, beloved...I was at your mercy," he replied, smiling. "I was quite helpless with laughter and--"

His words were cut short when the guardian jackknifed forward, startling him.

"A-asato?"

The violet-eyed man's face broke into a wicked smile, his arms snaking around broad shoulders.

"Ahh, you discoverd my stratgedy. It's taken me many years to hone and perfect it. I call it 'Operation Belly Laugh' and as you can see, it has succeeded. Now, Muraki Kazutaka. Will you surrender peacefully?" Amethysts glittered.

Muraki bit his lip, the corners of lips twitching. Getting ahold of himself, the doctor managed a straight face.

"I see that I have been bested by a serious adversary. Yes. Yes, Asato Tsuzuki, I surrender to you," he replied, his voice as serious as he could make it. "Now...what are your terms?"

Tsuzuki's brow puckered in thought. This was going much better than he planned. His beautiful contrite silver-haired angel and now at his mercy. No. It certainly couldn't get any better than this. Deciding not to string this delicious scenario too far along, he plunged right in, declaring what he most desired.

"My terms are this: We go into the bedroom where I will make myself comfortable. And then you will...undress for me..."

Surprise radiated from Muraki's silver eyes, completely taken aback. Was this his lover? His Asato making such a demand? A sexual demand, at that? A smile spread across the handsome man's face. Words couldn't express the joy blooming in his heart that his lover could be so bold. Bold and blushing, he noticed. Those cheeks were quite pink and flushed which made Tsuzuki's sexual claim all the more endearing and exciting.

Tsuzuki gave a sheepish smile, lowering his eyes, his heart hammering. He certainly got carried away but deep down he knew his lover was thrilled. What virile, vigorous, healthy, red-blooded man wouldn't be after such a declaration? AND his lover was always reminding him that whatever Tsuzuki asked of him, he would embrace with love. This time being no exception.

The silver blonde leaned forward, eyelids half-hooded, expression tender.

"It seems I am at your mercy. Very well. Lead the way." His hands clasped the guardian's waist to give a gentle push up as Tsuzuki seemed a little stunned. However, the violet-eyed beauty snapped out of his surprise and scrambled off the floor in eagerness. Grabbing his lover's hand, Tsuzuki trotted toward their room and pulled the taller man to stand in the middle. Breathing hard, Tsuzuki swallowed and stepped back, violets fixed on his lover's handsome face.

"It is hard to believe, beloved, that in such a short time you would be commanding and growing in your desires," Muraki whispered, unbuttoning his white shirt. "In your trust in me..."

Tsuzuki reddened, bowing his dark head. "It's...it's only right that I should grow, Kazutaka. My desires...my trust..." Tsuzuki looked up, his voice dropping to a breathy whisper. "My love for you...has grown since our first time."

"Beloved..."

_Our first time...._

* * *

_Ten months ago..._

"Oh man. What made me think this would work? It won't. It just won't."

Tsuzuki seemed on the verge of panic as he paced the small bedroom. Running both hands through his hair, he clasped his hands behind his neck.

"I'll cancel. That's it. I'll just call him and cancel. No big deal. He'll understand."

In three furious yanks, Tsuzuki succeeded in undoing the tie he had just tied ten minutes ago and tossed it to the floor in a huff. Plopping heavily on the small bed, the guardian bent forward, cradling his head in hands.

_I'll cancel. That's it. I'll just call him and tell him something came up and I'll cancel. No big deal. He'll understand._

"Dammit!"

Taking a deep breath, he lifted his head, staring at the mottled ceiling and tried to think of a plausible excuse.

_I'll just call him and tell him something came up at work and that I need to work overttime. Or I'm sick. Yeah, much better. Much more believable. I'm sick and we can go out another time...and...and...what the hell is wrong with me?!_

Sighing, Tsuzuki slight frame fell back against the small mattress bouncing a couple times, dark hair fanning against a faded bedspread.

_Why the hell am I backing out? I made the decision and now I'm backing out?!_

Tsuzuki rubbed his eyes. There was no getting around it. He had to face it. He was scared.

After his last date with Muraki five nights ago, Tsuzuki was feeling so happy, feeling confident that the doctor was sincere that he had made the decision to lose his virginity to the beautiful man on their NEXT date. Which was tonight. In about thirty minutes to be precise.

It had been a major decision for Tsuzuki, something not to be taken in a flippant manner. Especially now that he and Muraki were getting along much better than he could have imagined or hoped.

_Wait!_

Tsuzuki sat up, a sudden thought coming to him.

_I don't have to cancel! Muraki doesn't know anything about my decision. I didn't tell him!_

Relieved, Tsuzuki smiled. What was he worrying for? He would go on his date, enjoy himself and say good night and that's that. Picking up the discarded tie, he slung it around his neck. Walking up to the small mirror, he took his time in knotting it.

_Yup. Just go and see where Muraki takes us and enjoy myself and it'll be fine and I'll sleep with him some other time._

Hands stilled. Violets blinked.

_Sleep with him some other time..._

_Why...why am I hesitating? Why am I making this so complicated? It's what I want..."_

Biting his lip, violets gleamed from the mirror.

His feelings for Muraki. What were they exactly? He couldn't deny that he felt a deep attraction for the man. He honestly looked forward to their dates, being in Muraki's company. Listening to the doctor talk about his day and Muraki in turn listening to Tsuzuki talk about his day. No longer was the guardian wary or suspicious of the handsome blonde. Now, Tsuzuki found himself relaxing more and more and it was...nice.

_Now..._

Now, Tsuzuki's feelings, his urges were becoming more intense...more distracting. It was getting to where he couldn't concentrate at work. Constantly he found himself staring off into space dreaming of all sorts of erotic images, the silver blonde in different stages of undress. So much so, Tatsumi had called him up on it several times, even docking his pay twice!

The guardian sighed. Those dreams! Dreams where he imagined the doctor's perfect physique, wondering what it looked like naked. That alabaster skin and hard muscle. Muraki's beautiful face...silver eyes shining like diamonds; straight perfect nose, high cheekbones, thin brows...and that mouth! Those thin soft lips kissing him senseless, pale hands caressing Tsuzuki's naked body.

_Oh man!_

Tsuzuki whirled away from the mirror. He needed a drink. Going to the kitchen, he rummaged through the icebox and grabbed a bottle of half-drunk red wine. Not bothering to look for a glass, he swallowed a couple of times straight from it, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. He set the tall bottle down on the counter. He needed a clear head. Drinking himself to oblivion was not going to help him sort things out.

_I want him. I want to be with him...in that way. Why am I scared of that?_

Tsuzuki knew the reason before he asked the question. His lack of experience being the major obstacle. Not knowing what to do or how to initiate. He had a pretty good idea of the basics when two men coupled, but other than how it would feel physically, how much pain would be involved, he hadn't a clue. Probably a good amount of pain and discomfort.

Ask his friends?

_NO!_

Tsuzuki squeezed his eyes tight. What was he thinking?! No way was he going to ask any one of his friends for sexual tips! Tatsumi would just question his sanity...when WAS the last time Tatsumi had sex anyway? And Watari...well, Watari would snicker and tease him mercilessly.

_Definitely out of the quesiton!_

But it was on an emotional level, that Tsuzuki wondered what Muraki really felt for him. Lust and desire, no question the doctor felt that for he had said that often enough in the beginning...when they were enemies. But it seemed to Tsuzuki that Muraki was taking great pains not to push his attentions hard this time around.

But the brunette wanted more. There were times when he imagined Muraki cared more about him. Maybe even loved him.

_Love? Does he love me? I know he...he cares about me. I see the way he looks at me...the way he treats me. Can it more than that?_

He frowned. Could he sleep someone who didn't love him? If they desired one another isn't that enough? A few passionate, unforgettable nights and afterwards...

_Afterwards what? Move on? Just walk away? Make love a few times and just walk away from him? Or he walks away from me? He's experienced...and I'm not. I'd bore him..._

Tsuzuki shivered at the thought. wrapping his arms around himself, despair gripping his heart.

_Would it matter so much if he left me?_

Again, that sharp ache pierced him, almost making him double over.

_Yes, it would matter. It'd matter because...because..._

Tsuzuki caught his breath.

_I love him._

Tsuzuki's heart skipped. He gripped the edge of the table, the reality vibrating through his core.

"I love him. I love Kazutaka Muraki."

There. He said it outloud. Something that had been lurking in his heart and mind spoken aloud. Making it real. He smiled. It was exciting...this revelation. Exilerating and terrifying. Exilerating because he was in love for the first time in his life. Terrified because what if Muraki didn't reciprocate his feelings?

_Muraki..._

Starting, Tsuzuki glanced at his watch and swore. He was late! Not majorly late, but late enough. Running into his bedroom, Tsuzuki grabbed his trench and made a quick mental check. Sure he had everything, he closed his eyes and dissipated in a violet vapor.

* * *

Muraki checked the grandfather clock in the hall again wondering if the timepiece was running slow. But if that were the case, the hall clock, the mantlepiece clock, not to mention, his watch were running slow as well.

_Tsuzuki was late._

Fifteen minutes late. Concern had given away to trepidation, uneasiness flittering in his chest.

_I'm sure he's all right. But just to be sure..._

Flipping his cell phone open, he punched a button, his features impassive.

_I'm sure he's all right._

The phone on the other end rang and rang and rang...

Muraki snapped it shut, silver brows furrowed.

_The Bureau? Perhaps, a difficult case or a mountain of paperwork. I should call his work..._

**DING DONG**

_Tsuzuki!_

Much to Muraki's relief, it was Tsuzuki looking a little flustered but standing before him. Safe.

"Tsuzuki-san, come in, please." Muraki held open the door, the brunette walking in the entryway, a cold breeze behind him. The doctor shut the door and turned. He sighed inwardly with relief. Tsuzuki appeared to look all right. More than all right, actually. The wind had tossled the man's chestnut hair, fluffing it up; violet eyes were shining underneath the thick fringe of bangs; pink cheeks flush from the brisk outdoors all added to quite a beautiful creature.

"Sorry I'm late. I took too long getting ready and before I knew it, I was late. Sorry," Tsuzuki explained, taking his hands out of pockets and clasping them.

Muraki walked up to the smaller man and reached out to cup his chin. "As long as you are all right, Tsuzuki-san. I was worried," he murmured, his thumb stroking the gentle swell of cheek.

Tsuzuki gazed up, mezmerized by those silver orbs. "Y-you were?"

"Of course, Tsuzuki-san."

"I'm sorry! I should have called! I just...just wasn't thinking." The guardian just looked too distressed and a pang of sympathy pierced the doctor's heart.

"Shh, it's all right. You're here now." Muraki pulled Tsuzuki into his arms. "I'm not angry, Tsuzuki-san. Really. I was just...concerned. You were never late before." Slender fingers rubbed the guardian's nape, soothing.

_He cares about me._

Tsuzuki rested fully in the doctor's hug. "Sorry," he whispered into the silver blonde's chest.

Muraki frowned catching a note of sadness in the smaller man's apology.

"Here now. What's troubling you?" Muraki voice gentle. "What is it, Tsuzuki-san? Is it work?"

Tsuzuki's heart squeezed hearing the silver blonde's loving concern. He shook his head, dark bangs swaying. "Yes and no. Just the usual stuff at the Bureau. I guess...I guess I just need a break...a vacation."

Muraki assessed the brunette, then bent his head to give a sound kiss on the dark-haired man's temple. "It would do you good, Tsuzuki-san. As a valuable employee you must take periodic rests to keep up your strength and stamina. You should ask for some time off soon. Will you do that?"

Tsuzuki glanced up. "All right. I will. First thing tomorrow," he promised. He flashed a brilliant smile. "Thanks."

Muraki smiled back, eyes crinkling at the corners. "You are welcome. Now. Shall we go?" He motioned toward the front door. "I thought perhaps a show and dinner, then a walk in the park."

The guardian stood where he was. Desire, confusion, relief, happiness...all manner of emotions swirling throughout him. "I...I...Muraki?"

The silver blonde stilled at seeing Tsuzuki's face. "Yes, Tsuzuki-san?" He waited. He could tell the brunnette was debating with himself about something.

"Could we...could we stay in tonight? I mean, just have something here and...and watch a movie or talk?" Tsuzuki gulped, his cheeks warm.

So far in their dates, Tsuzuki had agreed with whatever the doctor planned, which suited him fine because he had never really ventured out before so anything Muraki suggested he knew would be interesting and fun. And it was. But this time, the guardian wanted to just spend the evening with just the two of them. Maybe as the evening progressed, Tsuzuki would gain enough courage to take things further.

Muraki approached the violet-eyed man with a grin. "I'd love that, Tsuzuki-san. What a marvelous idea," he remarked, quite pleased. "Here. Let me have your coat and then we'll see what's in the kitchen, ne?"

Tsuzuki nodded, doing just that, grateful that the doctor was willing. Handing the doctor his trench, Tsuzuki made way for the kitchen. Muraki watched the man's retreating back, admiring the cut of the tight jeans hugging that cute bottom nicely.

Taking a deep breath to steady his pounding heart, Muraki hung the dark coat and followed Tsuzuki. Opening up the large refridgerator he found some leftover chicken and sticky rice and suggested a quick stir fry. He put Tsuzuki to work by instructing how small to dice the vegetables, while he heated a large pan. It was slow-going for the guardian, not accustomed to handling a knife and making precise exacting pieces. Tsuzuki bit his lip trying his best but going painfully slow, mumbling his frustration at his clumsiness.

Muraki watched him for a minute.

"Here, Tsuzuki-san. Like this." Standing behind the smaller man, the doctor placed his hands over Tsuzuki's, took hold of the carrot and demonstrated slicing it in small matchstick pieces. "You see? Curl your fingers like this so the blade of the knife is against your knuckles so you're less apt to cut yourself. And...rock the knife like this...take it slow, don't rush. All right?"

Tsuzuki nodded, brows furrowed now trying his hardest to pay attention to the lesson. But damn it was hard! Muraki's lean hard body against his, the scent of his spicy cologne filling his nostrils, the warm breath against the nape of his neck. And those arms! He could practially feel how muscular the taller man's chest was. He swallowed and tried to focus and the task before him.

"Y-yeah. Rock the knife." He closed his eyes, savoring the moment, feeling a little light-headed.

"Good. Now let me watch you," Muraki said, his voice soft. Taking his hands away from Tsuzuki's to place on either side of the man, he leaned against the brunette's shoulder. "Yes, that's right. Nice and slow. Good, Tsuzuki-san!" Muraki paused, his eyelids dropping half-mast.

_Tsuzuki smells wonderful...like...like warmth and sunshine and green hills...and his hair...how does it get this silky...?_

The doctor's mind wandered and without thinking, he pressed his cheek on that silky head, his body relaxing.

Violets opened wide.

_Oh._

"Tsuzuki-san..."

Taking a chance, Tsuzuki leaned back, a soft sigh escaping. It felt so nice. He couldn't help feeling comforted and safe. Closing his eyes, he tilted his head, their cheeks pressed together. How long they stood like this, Tsuzuki had no idea. Forever would have suited him just fine as far as he was concerned.

_Forever..._

**_BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP!!!!!!!!!_**

_WHAT THE...?!_

Both men started, looking around at the source of that high-pitched screeching. It was the smoke alarm alerting them of the thick smoke emitting from the stove, the chicken sputtering hot oil and blackening in the copper skillet.

Muraki swore, grabbing a towel and dumped the pan into the stainless steel sink with a clatter, turning on the cold water faucet. Tsuzuki helped by taking another towel and flapping it wildly, trying to clear away the thick grey haze and coughing like mad. Muraki opened a nearby window a crack for fresh air. After a while the alarm finally quieted and the two men surveyed at the damage. Catching each other's eye, they burst into laughter.

"Well, Tsuzuki-san. *chuckle* I don't think chicken will be on the menu," Muraki said, shaking his head, picking up the soggy scorched pan.

"No, it sure won't," Tsuzuki replied, laughing. "Unless we want to settle for blackened chicken stir fry. It kind of looks like something I usually make."

The silver blond laughed at that. "Well, I'm usually not so careless. However..." Muraki gave a side-glance. "I never have been so nicely distracted before."

Tsuzuki gasped and looked down at his feet. "Yeah...umm, well. Sorry about that," he stammered.

Smiling, Muraki warmed to the guardian's bashful demeanor finding it quite adorable. "No need to be sorry, Tsuzuki-san. It is what it is." He clapped his hands, the brunette jerked his head up. "Now. What shall we do about dinner? I suggest we go back into that refridgerator and make a second attempt."

Tsuzuki grinned. "I'm game if you are."

* * *

After finishing a delicious meal of sweet tuna/rice rolls, they settled into the living room to watch new-release. As the credits were rolling, Muraki served up a platter of several varieties of small pastries and dessert wine. Muraki swirled the ruby wine in his glass, listening to Tsuzuki, the brunette's hands gesturing as he explained what he thought of the plot and how much he enjoyed the characters.

"I'm too much of a fan of suspense thrillers because they can get too complicated and heavy-handed. But I liked how the main focus was just on the two leads. It made it much better to follow and much more interesting when things started to go wrong for them. You felt like you were going through it with them." Tsuzuki took a bite of a spiced tart. "These are good, by the way."

Muraki smiled. "Thank you, Tsuzuki-san. And you bring up some interesting points." He reached over to set his glass down on the coffee table. "What did you think of the ending? Did you feel it was too ambiguous? Should it have been a more decisive conclusion?"

"Oh no! I think it made for a much better story," Tsuzuki protested. He took a swallow of wine. "The director leaves it up to the viewer to make up their own mind. It kind of goes with the whole scope of the picture."

"Very good." The silver blonde offered the guardian another pastry, then sat back against the sofa. Muraki watched Tsuzuki enjoy the dessert, his heart warmed. It was wonderful, spending an evening with him like this. Just relaxing and talking. Muraki didn't believe it possible that one day he would share such a time with the guardian. He was indeed grateful.

"How was work, Tsuzuki-san? A heavy work load?"

"No, nothing big." Tsuzuki leaned back as well, his head resting against the soft leather. He turned his head to better look at the taller man. "It's just the usual paperwork and general inventory. I knocked off a little early today so I'd have time to get ready but..." He bit his lip. "It...it didn't help. I still got here late."

A pale hand reached across and brushed Tsuzuki's bangs from his forehead. "It's all right, Tsuzuk-san. No harm done." Muraki's handsome features softened. "I am glad you are here."

Tsuzuki's body felt warm and tingly and the way Muraki was gazing at him right now...it just made him...happy. "I'll...I'll call next time so you won't...worry."

"Thank you, Tsuzuki-san." His hand still gently combing through the dark strands, rubbing them between his fingers.

"Do...do you worry about me, Muraki?" he asked, his voice a mere whisper. "DID you worry, I mean?"

Muraki's hand stilled. He dropped it to grasp Tsuzuki's slender one, giving it a light squeeze. "So there is no question, Tsuzuki-san. Yes. Yes, I did worry when you didn't call as you have not been late before." Seeing Tsuzuki's distressed face, he shook his head. "I wasn't angry nor upset. Just concerned. I care about you, Tsuzuki-san. Please don't doubt that."

Sudden tears gathered in violets that were wide with wonder. Swallowing down the thick lump in his throat, Tsuzuki blinked them back, hoping like mad they wouldn't fall. He would just be too embarrased. A grown man of his years on the verge of crying!

But Muraki noticed them right away, couldn't help but notice the way those violets glittered so he scooted himself closer. "Tsuzuki-san," he whispered. "Tell me what you're feeling. What's troubling you?"

"I...it's just that...I don't really think...I mean..."

_Dammit!_

To Tsuzuki's mortification, an errant tear escaped, a glistening trail in its wake. Before he could laugh it off and brush it away, Muraki's hand got their first, his fingers catching the droplet before it dripped off.

_Oh no! Now he thinks I'm an emotional mess!_

On the contrary. If Tsuzuki only knew how enchanted and touched Muraki was at that moment witnessing such vulnerability, he wouldn't have believed it. Indeed, the silver blonde seemed in a trance. He couldn't get over how unbelievably beautiful Tsuzuki looked. Those amethyst jewels, a full bottom lip trembling. How fragile and emotionally exposed. And not afraid to show it. The many times Muraki had witnessed Tsuzuki's fury and scorn towards him in the past and now...

Now, to see this side of violet-eyed beauty filled Muraki's heart with overwhelming feelings of love and awe. At the same time, a fierce protectiveness flooded the doctor's being to the guardian. Muraki could sense that the man harbored insecurity, that something was eating away at him. It was time to put the matter about how he felt about Tsuzuki to rest once and for all.

"Tsuzuki-san. My feelings for you are what they always were and always will be. I care about you. Very much." Muraki leaned forward, making sure that Tsuzuki understood fully. "No. It's more than that," he emphasized. With both hands the doctor placed them on the smaller man's upper arms to pull him forward and faced each other fully.

"I love you, Tsuzuki Asato. I love you."

Tsuzuki blushed.

"No tricks. No hidden agenda. When I told you at the beginning that I put aside my revenge and pain, I meant it. I willingly gave them up to come to you with my soul laid bare. To court you properly...if you would have me. These past weeks have been more than I could have hoped for...being with you like this. You seem to trust me more and more and for that, I am grateful."

Tsuzuki listened, Muraki's words calming and exilherating. The way in which the silver blonde declared his love felt all together different to Tsuzuki. He couldn't explain it but the way Muraki looked straight into his eyes, the sincerity in his voice, his softened features...it all added to one thing:

Tsuzuki believed him.

A slow smile spread over his face, violets twinkling.

"Tsuzuki-san? What are you thinking?" He cupped a tan cheek. "Can you tell me?"

The guardian nodded. "Yeah." Sliding his arms around Muraki's shoulders, he leaned forward to hug the doctor. "You love me. You've said it before and...and I never believed you...considering what we were to each other before. But now...I don't know...it feels different now. YOU'RE different."

Muraki wrapped his arms around Tsuzuki's body, running his hands up and down the slender frame, concerned at the way he was trembling.

"You mean a great deal to me, Tsuzuki-san. I will pay for my past, I know that. But for now I couldn't go on living without telling you how I feel about you...truly feel. And...and if by some miracle, you care for me a little..."

Tsuzuki pushed himself away to look at the silver blonde, violets searching the man's face. "Muraki..."

Muraki smiled. A sad smile that didn't quite reach his shimmering eyes. "It's too much to hope for, I know. Perhaps...perhaps just knowing you do not hate me as you once did will be...will be enough."

The doctor's voice broke at the last word and bowed his head, shamed that his fear had gotten the better of him. He didn't want to show this side to Tsuzuki. He didn't want Tsuzuki's love out of pity, a charity case, if you will. He didn't want the guardian to feel the need to be with him out of a sense of guilt. The many times Muraki had to restrain his emotions and not throw himself at Tsuzuki's feet, begging for the violet-eyed beauty's forgiveness and stay with him, love only him.

Muraki released Tsuzuki, getting to his feet, despair rolling over him.

_DAMMIT!!_

What had started out as a lovely evening was, much to the doctor's mortification, crumbling.

_I don't want him to see me like this!_

The doctor went to the window and fixed his gaze at the garden concentrating on the little shrine at the end of the path and took measured breaths.

Never seeing this side of the doctor before, Tsuzuki couldn't move at first, stunned.

_He's hurting! All this time he's been hurting..._

He stood up, walking up to the tall man's lean frame. "Muraki..." He stood at the doctor's side, touching his arm. "Muraki, I--"

Muraki whirled around, Tsuzuki took an instictive step back. Plastering a smile on his face, Muraki rushed into speech.

"Forgive me, Tsuzuki-san. That...that was quite unnecessary of me to...to subject you to that. It was not my intention to lose...control." He waved his hand toward the sofa. "Please. Sit down and we'll continue our discussion. Would you like another drink or a cup of tea? I have some imported chocolates that may tempt--"

"Don't!"

Silver eyes widened.

"Don't do that, Muraki! Don't hide what you're really feeling from me!" Tsuzuki stood straight, lifting his chin, violets piercing straight through, not letting the doctor get away with anything. "In all the times we've been together, I've never seen this side of you." His tone softened. "Please don't be afraid to show it. I want to help you. And...and I do care about you."

Tsuzuki took a deep breath and stood closer to the silver blond. "I was late tonight because I needed to sort out what my feelings for you were. I mean, what yours were for me."

Muraki studied the brunette's face, a slight frown knitting.

"I know...I know you," Tsuzuki's voice turned into a whisper. "...desire me. And I thought that was all you felt. And I thought...I mean, I told myself it was okay. That we could...we could BE together and I would be fine if it was just a...a physical relationship. But the thought of you...walking away, leaving after you've had your fill of me..."

Muraki grabbed Tsuzuki's upper arms. "No, Tsuzuk-san, no. I'd never do that," he assured with heat. "Never!"

Tsuzuki managed a weak smile. "Yeah...I know that now. You love me..."

"I do! More than anything!" Thinking it would be better to show the brunette than mere words, Muraki lowered his head, giving a deep kiss. Surprise froze Tsuzuki but only for a few heartbeats. With a groan, he wound his arms around the slim waist, his hands clutching Muraki's back.

Heaven. Tsuzuki was in absolute bliss, his lips being the recipient of such a thorough caress. He delighted in the feel of Muraki's silken mouth which tasted of wine and a lemon sweet. Light-headed, unable to get enough he clung to the doctor's strong body returning the kiss with great enthusiasm. After a time, Muraki lifted his head, pressing his cheeks against Tsuzuki's temple, catching his breath, eyes closed.

"Tsuzuki-san...Asato," he breathed. "Never doubt...my love for you, Asato. Please. That you may care for me...even a little...then that would be..."

"I love you."

Eyes snapped open. "What?!"

"I love you, Mur-Kazutaka." Tsuzuki stared back, violets glistening.

"Asato? Can this be true?"

Tsuzuki nodded, his eyes fixed on that beautiful face. "I love you," he repeated with a bit more force, happy that the truth was told. "I don't know why I waited so long to tell you..."

Muraki didn't know whether to laugh or cry, the guardian's confession making his senses reel, turning his world on its axis.

_Asato Tsuzuki LOVES me!!_

"You're telling me now," he whispered. His smile grew, straight white teeth forming into a brilliant smile. "Asato, say it again. Tell me again. Please!"

Catching Muraki's mood, Tsuzuki grinned. "I love you, Kazutaka Muraki." He threw his arms around the silver blonde's neck, hugging him hard. "I. Love. You!"

Muraki hugged him back. "It's true...it's true. You love me...I'm not dreaming. Not this time. You love me..."

"Yes, yes, yes!" Laughing, Tsuzuki felt himself being hoisted and spun around and buried his face into the crook of the doctor's neck. Doubts, worries, fears, anxieties...all his cares dissolved. All that mattered was that Muraki Kazutaka was a changed man and he loved him. The silver blonde was beside himself. He didn't know what to do. For the first time in his life, he didn't know what to do. To laugh or cry or run down the street shouting that the most beautiful man in all of Japan loved him, forgave him. It was all too much. All too wonderful for words.

_A miracle! I'm happy. I never thought this would be possible..that I could be this happy. Never..._

"Kazutaka?"

"Yes, Asato?" Muraki lifted his head a little to look at the brunette, his smile radiant. "What is it?"

"Can I...can I spend the night?"

TBC

* * *

A/N: How was that? Like I said, one of my first stories was how Muraki and Tsuzuki first coupled. And looking back on that, I realized it was kind of rushed and didn't express the emotions too well. But, hey. It was my first attempt. So NOW I'm hoping to make up for that by writing this.

And murasaki mean 'violet' in Japanese. A friend suggested the title because of the reference to Tsuzuki and how those violets were reacting to his many emotions. Thanks, Poppy Lee!

So a review would be lovely, let me know what you think. And I'll get that next chapter up, pronto! Thanks so much and until next time! :)


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I do not own Yami no Matsuei. Just you wait though.

A/N: Hi all! So sorry for the lateness of the update. Things kept coming at me, plus I must've tweaked this thing too many times! Since I have a few days respite, I thought I'd better get this up there before I do any more damage. Thanks for your patience. Enjoy!

* * *

_Can I...can I spend the night?_

Muraki pulled back the thick comforter and covers underneath, smoothing it down. He had doused the overhead light and left the bedside lamp on. He paused a moment, the sound of water coming from the bathroom letting him know Tsuzuki was still showering. He sighed, his insides quivering in excitement, of what this evening could bring.

They were going to sleep together. Their first night in each other's arms.

He smiled. The doctor was elated, thrilled beyond words that his beloved was taking this next step in their relationship. That HE initiated it. It meant he trusted Muraki even more. However, what this entailed exactly was unknown.

_How far does Tsuzuki want to take this? Does he wish to lie together, to talk then to sleep?_

Muraki walked to the French window. Streaks of deepening greys, reds, oranges, a multitude of fiery hues painting the darkening skies. A beautiful night.

_No matter what happens this night, it will be the start of a new beginning for us._

For Muraki, no question he desperately wanted to make love to the violet-eyed beauty who right at this moment was soaping up that perfect naked body clean. That image alone sent shivers down his spine. But what did Tsuzuki want? The doctor made a vow that he wouldn't push Tsuzuki in this. But if the guardian was willing he would not hesitate and do everything possible to initiate Tsuzuki into the pleasures of sex in the most loving way possible.

_But for now..._

Muraki tightened the sash of the white yukata and turned away from the window. He went about his nightly ritual of setting the clock, closing the left drape, putting his glasses on the nightstand and, now, trying to keep his heart from bursting out of his ribs. A mad, wonderful vision of yanking the bathroom door open, marching into that shower, and gathering that adorable creature's wet body into his arms, a passionate kiss, setting off a chain reaction of lust-fueled lovemaking, gripped Muraki's brain.

_Ka-Kazutaka! Wha-what are you doing?! Oh! Ohhhhh...Kazutakaaa...mmmm...yessss...._

The silver blond shuddered, prayed for self-control and counted to ten.

_Asato.._

_

* * *

_Tsuzuki wrapped the thick thirsty white towel around him, blotting up the moisture after his invigorating shower. What a treat it had been to wash in such a luxurious bathroom! The hot jet spray of the shower came in all directions, his body receiving quite a massage, both energizing and relaxing. Just what he needed. He wiped up his slender arms and legs, a small smile on his lips.

And such a huge shower stall! Tsuzuki couldn't get over the many conveniences a bathroom could offer. The sea-green and gold color scheme set off the gleaming gold faucets throughout, heated floor tile which at this moment was keeping his bare feet toasty, a sunken marble tub that seemed built for ten adjacent to a large picture window with the most fantastic view of a garden exploding with vibrant color. The guardian walked up to it giving thought as to just how secluded the estate really was.

Did Muraki often bathe with no regard as to who may be peeping in the bushes? Tsuzuki squinted, peering closer to the window. It SEEMED private enough. Tsuzuki made a mental note to ask Muraki if he could explore the garden someday and could check that out for himself.

He sighed longingly. So many light years from the brunet's own cramped living quarters. His face broke into a wide grin. He could certainly get used to this!

Satisfied he was dry enough, he tossed the used cloth into the hamper, reaching for the yukata. The white thin cotton robe hung down to his calves and gaped a bit at his chest. He secured the sash and turned to look in the mirror.

_This is it._

He wiped off the steam from the glass and checked his reflection with a critical eye. Frowning, he scrubbed his cheeks thinking them much too ruddy but then belatedly realized that that was just making it worse.

_Damn._

He didn't want to appear over anxious. Filling his lungs with air, he closed his eyes, then exhaled. That was better. His heart wasn't pounding as hard now, the blood easing into a light thrumming in his ears.

_Get ahold of yourself, Tsuzuki!_

He looked all right. Running his fingers through his damp hair, he combed it with care, keeping his mind on work; on the mounds of paperwork that awaited; on a movie he'd been wanting to rent; what he wanted to eat tomorrow...anything to not think too much of what awaited him beyond the bathroom door.

After his initial hesitancy, he had finally broken down and asked Watari for advice. Thank goodness Watari's demeanor was serious on the matter. Since Tsuzuki was so insistent in his choice of Muraki becoming his lover, the blond scientist cautioned Tsuzuki about being prepared, of taking care of himself since there wasn't a natural lubrication for men. And to make sure Muraki was considerate in that.

But Watari was wary on that point. His voice firm and matter-of-fact as he warned his friend.

_I won't lie, Tsuzuki. Not even to spare your feelings. There is going to be some pain involved. For your sake and as Muraki knows this is your first time, he should treat you with care and respect. Express that up front. Take care of yourself, Tsuzuki. Insist on lubrication. If the doctor doesn't hear you on this and bullies you, speak up on what you want from him, what you expect from this relationship. This is your body after all. If he refuses and tries to convince you it isn't necessary, leave. You don't need someone who will hurt you like that and won't consider your feelings on this. Hmph. I hope you're sure about this, Tsuzuki. This IS Muraki we're talking about. The man who caused you pain and heartache in the past not to mention countless others..._

Tsuzuki blocked out the rest of the memory. No need to rehash in his head the argument with Watari in his defense of the doctor.

_If...if it comes to that...if Kazutaka is...forceful...I'll walk out...I...I won't see him again..._

But just as he was thinking of it, he shook his dark head, eyes squeezed tight, a wish deep in his heart hoping that that was not the case.

_Kazutaka isn't like that. I KNOW he isn't. Kazutaka loves me._

Armed with that bit of confidence, the guardian opened the door and stepped out.

* * *

Hearing the door open Muraki turned. At the sight of the guardian, the doctor's belly did a couple of somersaults.

Smiling, he greeted the brunet and ran an appreciative gaze over the slender frame. Dark, damp hair sticking up this way and that, lithe body squeaky clean and filling out that light robe rather well...and those violets. In the waning light, instead of their usual brightness, they were now reflecting a deep indigo hue...almost midnight black, taking everything around him in with those seductive pools.

_Beautiful._

"Did you enjoy your shower, Asato?" The doctor asked, approaching the smaller man to clasp his hand and appearing much calmer than he actually felt. "I trust you had everything you needed?"

"Yeah, thanks! It was great! Way better than what I'm used to," Tsuzuki replied, beaming.

A slight warmth covered his cheeks. He couldn't help but note how handsome and different the silver blond appeared without the wire-rimmed glasses framing his features. His face now looked...open. Naked. Speaking of which, Muraki is naked right now under that yukata...

_Sexxeee_

Tsuzuki gulped.

Muraki nodded in return then gave a slight frown, his eyes scanning the man's head. "Come here, Asato."

Walking into the bathroom to fetch a clean towel he came back out, unfolding it. "Your hair is dripping a bit. Let me dry it for you." With that, he draped the cloth over the smaller man's head and proceeded to rub it in gentle circles. In less than a second,Tsuzuki's whole body went limp. Violets drooping closed, his lips huffing out a satisfied sigh.

Muraki heard it and grinned, taking his time to rub the thick towel in the dark mass, long fingers working over the scalp, making it tingle. Slow, methotical, small, circular motions...from top to temples to nape. Working and massaging thoroughly so as to not miss an inch. The doctor was in no rush and judging from the little whimpers Tsuzuki gave, it was task well-appreciated.

Cut much too short for Tsuzuki's taste, the silver blond gave a final pat then drew the cloth away. Now, Tsuzuki's chestnut strands really stuck up all over his head. Turning the brunet around to face him and with his bare fingers and painstaking attention, Muraki smoothed the silk tresses, combing here and there, tucking a few behind an ear then fixing the unruly bangs forward over violets, all the while a gentle smile playing on his lips.

Tsuzuki felt as though all the bones in his body turn watery, without substance. Muraki's tender ministrations pierced right through his soul. He lowered his eyes and enjoyed the sensations.

The doctor took his time, watching Tsuzuki's face...the way the guardian's eyelids flagged bringing a dreamy quality to his features.

"There. Much better," the doctor said quietly, reluctantly withdrawing, taking a step back. Each man stared at the other, both unwilling to break the tranquil moment.

It was Muraki who shook himself mentally. With a quick kiss to Tsuzuki's cheek, Muraki tossed the damp towel into the hamper. Coming back, he squeezed Tsuzuki's warm hand, gazing down at the man, still finding it hard to believe Tsuzuki decided to be with him, to risk so much. Tsuzuki's face was a wondrous mixture of reservation, shyness, hope, desire...driving Muraki's blood to quicken in his veins.

"Y-your home, Kazutaka...it's so spacious and elegant...and huge!" Tsuzuki exclaimed. "I've never seen such an elaborate manor much less stepped foot in one!"

An automatic and polite 'thank you, Tsuzuki-san' was on the tip of the doctor's tongue, but at the last moment he bit it back, the truth of the matter needed to be foremost. And didn't he vow to himself to be truthful where Tsuzuki was concerned?

"This place...this place...is not a home, Asato, not in the real sense of the word," he confessed. Seeing Tsuzuki's puzzled face, Muraki explained. "To me growing up in such a place with its enormous rooms and long, long hallways and expensive museum-like decor did not make for a happy childhood."

"Kazutaka..."

Dropping his silver gaze, Muraki took a breath, that awful feeling of distress bubbling to the surface. He was taking a chance at revealing to Tsuzuki what the reality of his beginnings were like. The loneliness with no one for company except those damn porcelain dolls, the rage at discovering his true demon heritage and that he was the only one of his kind...until that fateful day...Tsuzuki's faded image in that photograph.

Muraki started when Tsuzuki reached up to press his hand against the white cheek. "Kazutaka...I didn't know...you were lonely, weren't you?"

Silvers shimmered. "I...I...Asato..."

What was the use of holding it in? Didn't he dream those endless dreams of exactly this type of moment? A moment where the beautiful guardian would look at him with love and understanding in those violets and he would talk without reservation and forever be free of this pain and loneliness and rage?

Tsuzuki sensed the doctor's hesitation deep in his bones and instinctively and without a word pulled Muraki into his arms. A choked, muffled sob escaped the silver blond and he hugged Tsuzuki all the tighter. Tears slipped from silver lashes and slender fingers threaded into dark hair, holding the slender body close.

"Asato...you don't know...don't realize the depths of my...how incredibly horrid..." Muraki whispered. Would Tsuzuki leave him now?

"Kazutaka...what you've been through...I...I know it's been...bad." Muraki tightened his arms around him. "Please don't hide anything from me. I...I want to help you," Tsuzuki whispered, his voice unwavering. "I WANT to be with you...in all things."

Muraki lifted his head, the remnants of his sorrow streaking his cheeks. Any other time, he would have never shown such weakness. But this wasn't any other time.

"I must know, Asato," he said. "Tell me truthfully. Is it out of pity that you feel...that you have made your decision to...?"

"No!" Tsuzuki shook his head, startling Muraki. "My feelings for you were developing long before I agreed to go out with you!" Violets flashed, cheeks bloomed a flushed pink. "I...I desired you even when we...even when we were enemies, Kazutaka. I fought and fought my...my attraction for you so many times! Even when I told you...shouted at you that I hated you...I couldn't help but...but desire you too..."

Muraki blinked. Tsuzuki trembled at the confession.

"You wanted me...even then?" The doctor whispered, incredulous.

"Yes!" Tsuzuki exclaimed. Then he lowered his voice, both hands gripping the front of the doctor's robe. "Yes. I wanted you...so much," he whispered. "It...it wasn't love...not then. It was lust...and I was ashamed...I hated myself for those base urges...we were enemies and...and I had to do my job and track you down and take you in and...and in all that time...at the end of the day...when I was alone...I wondered...I wondered what it would feel like to be...held by you...and...and to be...kissed by you..."

Silvers widened.

Muraki had no idea Tsuzuki had harbored such desires for him since the beginning. Muraki's mind raced back to that time and those days of their fierce confrontations and violent battles. With a jolt, a particular bloody combat flashed in his head. The doctor's rage at an all time high, his fevered frustration at Tsuzuki's constant denials of their attraction, it had been too much. He hurled taunts and ridicule, flung blatant sexual innuedoes at the brunet, one right after the other, no letting up. And Tsuzuki, outraged and protesting, standing up to it as best he could.

Muraki swallowed down the thick lump forming in his throat.

_Those violets...they were shimming so brightly then...unshed tears..._

Muraki closed his eyes. Complete shame and regret washing over him.

_All this time he wanted me. So much could have been avoided...pain, heartache...confessions of love declared so much sooner...but I was so hell-bent on vengeance, on hurting Asato as much as I was hurting inside...even if he had confessed then, I wouldn't have heard him...my only intention being to use him...defile him...break his spirit..._

"Asato..."

Tsuzuki lifted his head, a sad smile formed. "Both of us, Kazutaka...both of us have been through hell, ne? You don't know everything about me...and I don't know everything about you...but...I want to know you, Kazutaka..."

"And I you, Asato," Muraki said quickly. He leaned in, pulling Tsuzuki to him and pressed his lips against the man's temple. "Everything. We can ease each other's pain, ne? I am so sorry and deeply ashamed for what I have put you through. The hurt I cruelly inflicted upon you."

"Kazutaka..."

"That you love me now in spite of what I have done to you...is beyond miraculous. There are no words to express my happiness in your being here," the silver blond again kissed Tsuzuki's temple and forehead.

Tsuzuki closed his eyes, his body drawing on Muraki's warmth and words and kisses. And the doctor, in turn, hugged the smaller man tighter, murmuring words of apology. Tsuzuki responded to the lean muscular frame, his hands reaching around the slim waist, dark head resting on the broad chest.

"I forgive you, Kazutaka. I do," Tsuzuki reassured. He felt Muraki's long fingers combing through his hair and then give a gentle tug, prompting him to lift his chin. Pale lips touched his, a kiss to comfort at first, then igniting into more.

"I cannot...fathom...how you could...forgive...me...wretched soul that...I am..." Muraki murmured between kisses. He couldn't help asking the question nor bestowing tender kisses to Tsuzuki, especially since the brunet was kissing just as tenderly back.

"Don't say that...please...both of us...so many regrets...but I don't regret this..." Tsuzuki answered, breathless. With a small growl, he parted his lips, an invitation for a deeper kiss. An invitation that Muraki happily took.

Threading his fingers into that thick mane, Muraki pulled back Tsuzuki's head lower and covered his mouth. It was time to initiate his soon-to-be lover and what better way than with kisses. Lots of them. The silver blond teased a full bottom lip, swiping it back and forth with the tip of tongue, persuading the brunet to reciprocate. Tsuzuki let out a soft moan, his legs wobbly, and slid his arms around the taller man's shoulders to help in staying upright. Eager to continue, Tsuzuki massaged his tongue against Muraki's and delighted in its taste.

And Muraki tasted wonderful!

Red wine with a hint of mint and chocolate. Whimpering, driven on instinct, Tsuzuki swirled his tongue inside the warm cavern, a sudden greediness in wanting to taste more. Muraki lifted his head a bit, his damp lips a hairbreadth away, silver eyes glassy. What he thought would be light and teasing had escalated to quite a feverish pitch in a matter of seconds. Tsuzuki lifted his face, frustration crossing his features at the doctor's pause.

"Kazuta--mmph!"

He got no further in his protest. His mouth was smothered once again and Tsuzuki did his best to keep up, trying not to think but just to let go and enjoy what felt good, what felt so right in this moment. He never knew kisses could be this heady and arousing. And it helped that Muraki was such a remarkable kisser.

_He must have been holding back on our dates..._

Because if Muraki had kissed him like this he would have slept with him the first night!

Now and again, the silver blond would lift his head to catch his breath, to press nibbles along the brunet's swollen lips before going in for another heated plunder.

Tsuzuki's groin ached, needing to be tended to but not knowing in what way. It was Muraki who held the key to easing this gnawing frustration of that he was sure. How much time passed, the guardian couldn't tell, his arms tightened around the taller man's neck, at one point one hand fisting silver hair.

Muraki slid a hand against the sensitive nape, his dulled nails lightly scratching. Tsuzuki shivered, goosebumps prickling up and down his arms. He could feel the fabric of the yukata sliding a bit revealing a bare shoulder. And then Muraki's mouth breaking their kiss to gently bite on that bare shoulder. This unexpected treat had Tsuzuki sighing with pleasure. Silver hair tickled his cheek and he began to tremble harder, his knees almost knocking together. The silver blond turned his head trailing kisses from shoulder to collarbone to swell of pinkened cheek. With silvers twinkling, the doctor released Tsuzuki to step back and pull down the covers of the bed lower.

"Let's get under the covers, ne? I'll keep you warm there," he whispered. With a kiss to a warm cheek, Muraki removed his robe entirely, the fabric whisping at his ankles.

"Oh!"

Violets nearly popped out of his head!

_Kazutaka! He's so...so...GORGEOUS!_

Alabaster skin...as white as cool marble reminded Tsuzuki of a Greek statue, violets roamed over the smooth shoulders, defined chest and down to abdominal muscles and...and..

Tsuzuki gulped.

Muraki's desire on full display, proudly jutting out between his pale thighs, happy to see Tsuzuki.

"Ka-Kazutaka..."

Muraki studied Tsuzuki from underneath his silver bangs, delighting in the brunet's flustered and blushing state. Turning to the bed the silver blond leaned over to pull down the coverings.

Tsuzuki gaped, violets honed in on that rear end. Those tight perfect globes rippling and flexing as the doctor stretched and reached. Heart beating double time, Tsuzuki was gripped with the fierce impulse to take those succulent ass cheeks in both hands and squeeze, squeeze, squeeze.

_Oh god...!!_

Blushing, Tsuzuki bit back a groan, his cock twitched. He quickly lowered his eyes to focus hard on the thick comforter instead, his fingers plucking at the hem of a sheet.

"Umm...I...I like your...your sheets," he cleared his throat. "They look...ummm soft," Wishing in the next instant he could bite off his tongue the moment that lame remark came out. Or at the very least the floor would swallow him up.

_Why the hell did I say that?!_

Muraki only smiled and settled his long frame on the soft mattress.

"Thank you, Asato. Yes. They are quite soft and comfortable. Now, come to bed and see for yourself." He held out his arms.

Tsuzuki looked up. With a nod and a sheepish smile, he complied.

"O-okay."

With shaking fingers, he worked at the knot, eager to lie next to the silver blond. Seconds ticked by. And with each passing second the brunet frown become more furrowed.

_What the hell?!_

Swearing under his breath, the guardian tugged and pulled and seemed to only succeed in making the damn thing tighter. Flashing up a quick, embarrassed grin, Tsuzuki continued with his task, biting his lip, and completely unaware of the funny scene he was giving.

Muraki smoothed the bedspread, tucking the sheet and doing his damndest not to laugh outloud. Surpressing a grin, he pressed his lips together hard, a giggle bubbling in his throat.

_Oh, this is priceless!_

More proof that Tsuzuki never failed to amuse and tickle him. Just another reason the doctor loved him so much. He let the guardian struggle a bit longer, half curious to see how Tsuzuki would get out of it and half for his own amusement. Honestly, the man was too cute!

"Are you all right, Asato?" he asked, keeping his voice casual.

"Yeah! Just about got it. Almost there," Tsuzuki replied, really pulling on the stubborn sash with determination. "Oh damn." He looked up.

"It's stuck."

That did it. Muraki couldn't help it. He laughed loud, silvers twinkling and completely disarming the brunet.

"Kazutaka?"

Chuckling, his entire body shaking and grinning, the doctor held out his arms beckoning to the bewildered guardian. "C-come here. Asato. Let me help."

Tsuzuki scrambled up and scooted next to the silver blond, tucking his legs underneath him. Muraki sat up and reached for the front of the brunet's robe, frowning slightly at the dilemma.

"Let's see," he studied it for a moment. "Well, Asato. Looks like a triple knot going on here," he assessed, his fingers working over it. Silver brows deepend. "Hmm, on second look, perhaps a quadruple," he murmured.

"Oh man..." Tsuzuki groaned.

He couldn't have been more embarrassed. This was not the impression he wanted to make! He had gone over this precise moment in his head countless times and in his fantasies everything would be perfect. Perfect conversation, perfect evening, leading up to a perfect seduction scene. And he'd make the perfect impression. Confident and seductive, knowing all the right things to say. And Muraki would be so dazzled and bequiled toward the violet-eyed man's beauty that he would fall more in under Tsuzuki's spell and thus, more in love with him.

THAT'S the way Tsuzuki had pictured it. An unforgetable evening.

_It's unforgettable all right. Can't even get out of the damn robe!_

"Perhaps the scissors..."

"What?!" The brunet jolted from his musing. "Oh no! Is it that bad?!" Tsuzuki exclaimed, truly mortified now. "I'm so sorry!"

Muraki leaned over and kissed the brunet's hot cheek. "Now, now. It is only a robe. Quite insignificant." In his hand, a pair of large scissors appeared. He angled them and before the brunet could say another word about it, snipped at the sash. "You have to admit, Asato. It is amusing, ne?" The scissors disappeared and Tsuzuki's yukata was free and gaping open.

"It is?" The brunet asked, incredulous. "But it was a klutzy thing to do! So unromantic and unsmooth!"

Muraki laughed again.

"Huh?"

"Unsmooth?" Muraki grinned. He shook his head. "Far from it." He sat back a little, gazing at the brunet, his face softening. "Truly, Asato, I have a very keen feeling that life with you would not be dull."

Tsuzuki's face cracked into a small smile, surprise registering. "R-really?"

"Really," the doctor affirmed, pulling the guardian to him. "My life up until meeting you was quite mundane, uneventful. Nothing but work. But with you...ah, well. Let's just say, meeting you has been one surprise after another."

Tsuzuki relaxed, a bashful smile peeking through. "I-I didn't think my clumsiness and unsmoothness..."

"Unsmoothness?"

"Well, yeah!"

Muraki chuckled, reaching up to brush the guardian's bangs from his eyes.

Tsuzuki smiled. "I didn't think all that would be thought of as amusing. But, hey!" He interjected. "Maybe in a few years you'll reconsider and think it annoying as hell and wonder why you ever got hooked up with me!" he joked.

The silver blond's hand stopped, his smile fading at the guardian's jest.

_In a few years..._

Grasping the brunet's upper arms, a serious expression morphing into place, his heart skipping a beat.

"You will...be with me...in a few years, Asato?"

Tsuzuki gasped, catching the doctor's serious demeanor right away, realizing what he had said, seeing how the gravity of his words affected the beautiful blond's face.

"Yeah. Yes, I will, Kazutaka," he replied, the answer firm. He straightened his spine, violets looking straight into silvers. "I will."

Muraki gave a slight nod. "With me..." With a yank, he hugged the smaller man, letting out a breath he didn't know he held and joy flooding up to the brim of his being.

Being held this way, in strong arms, Muraki's naked body against his definitely surpassed all of Tsuzuki's wildest imaginings. Sliding his arms around Muraki's shoulders, the brunet nuzzled his face into the crook of the man's neck, closing his eyes and breathing in the scent of roses and sandalwood.

"I am glad," the doctor whispered. "Asato. You are so very precious to me," Muraki continued softly. Pressing his lips against Tsuzuki's ear, he whispered tender words, gathering strength in the violet-eyed beauty's warmth. "Be yourself. Your true self with me. Do not concern yourself about trying to impress me or feel you must not show vulnerability. Only be yourself with me. That is man I fell in love with."

"Kazutaka..." Tsuzuki pulled away a bit, eyes searching. "You mean that, don't you?"

Muraki nodded, his eyes shimmering. "Yes, I do. You are a unique being, Asato. What you think of as 'inexperienced' and 'unsmooth,'" he smiled when Tsuzuki winced at that. "I find to be charming and endearing. Please believe me when I say I adore your innocence. And...your darkness."

Violets widened.

"Yes, Asato. We are both the same in that regard. And there are certain...advantages to this darkness when two demon mates join. Heightened awareness...heightened pleasures." Muraki slipped the brunet's robe down to the crook of his elbows.

"M-mates?" Tsuzuki whispered, trying to appear nonchalant at the way Muraki's eyes roved over his half-exposed body, but failing miserably as his heart sped up making him dizzy.

_That's right. Demons. My demon half joining with my mate._

Shivering, Tsuzuki gave a healthy blush, the lustful gleam in Muraki's eyes taking in his bared chest and torso.

"Yes, Asato. Mates," Muraki replied, his mouth set into a grim line.

It was important to the doctor that Tsuzuki be aware of this heritage between them. Having tried forceful persuasion in the beginning, almost breaking the guardian's spirit and after the Kyoto encounter, Muraki knew he had done wrong by Tsuzuki in that way. And he was deeply ashamed. Now, it was time, at long last to make it up the violet-eyed beauty. Now, having been given this second chance with Tsuzuki and completely abandoning his hateful past, Muraki would nurture and awaken Tsuzuki's demon side. This time, in a loving way.

Bending his head, he bestowed several kisses to the brunet's cheek and sweet-smelling neck. Cupping Tsuzuki's other cheek, naked chests together, the doctor whispered. "Let me see all of you."

In no time, off came the thin robe, tossed to the side. Olive-toned skin gleamed, a beautiful male specimen in full view.

"Asato..." The silver blond breathed. "My dreams have not done you justice...you are so beautiful..."

Blood roared in Tsuzuki's ears, dizzying him, making his face hot. "I'm...I..." Embarrassed beyond words, the brunet trembled, then threw his arms around Muraki's neck, a rash reaction at the compliment.

The doctor understood, his arms immediately circling around the brunet's waist and back. "You are, Asato. Very beautiful. You don't believe so?" he asked quietly, fingers skimming patterns on the bare back.

The brunet shook his head. "No," he answered, his voice muffled.

Muraki squeezed the lithe body and dropped kiss after kiss on Tsuzuki's tan shoulder. "You are, Asato. Believe me..." the silver blond entreated. He combed his long fingers into chestnut hair, his other hand gliding up the slick back. "Exquisite lines and planes...delectable sweet angles...lean tight muscles...limbs long and sleek and graceful...this body...such masculine beauty..." Muraki's hands skimmed along Tsuzuki's naked skin, the husky tone in his voice only adding to the brunet's excitement.

"Kazutaka..." he breathed, dropping his head back, bright violets transforming to deep rich plum.

"Beautiful...sexy...desirable...you are all this and so much more..." Muraki's lips and tongue licked and bit the guardian's throat, nibbling at the pulse point, making him squirm. Tsuzuki was a dream come true...the way he fit so perfectly in the silver blond's arms, the way he responded to the doctor's many kisses and caresses. It was more than Muraki had fantasized.

"I want you, Asato," Muraki hand slid to the guardian's trim waist from behind, the other sliding in front, fingers brushing over a pert nipple. "Do you want me?"

Tsuzuki couldn't answer, hot and aroused he was, writhing in helpless abandon. His body, hypersensitive to the doctor's touches, his cock flush against his belly, how could he answer the doctor's query when his brain cells turned to mush?

"I...I...please..."

Muraki moved forward, cradling Tsuzuki, laying him onto his back. He loomed down and smiled at the evidence of the brunet's desire in front of him.

"You DO want me, Asato," sounding triumphant, his grin wide. Silvers collide with heavy-lidded violets. His smile faded and the silver-blond shivered, the full force of what that meant hitting him, turning his voice softer. "You want me..."

Tsuzuki stared up, open and trusting. The man, himself, body naked and exposed, vulnerable and a little scared. But not of the man looming over him. Not of him.

_He loves me..._

Holding out his arms, a soft whimper escaped, his plea rewarded when Muraki immediately gathered him close, sighing in happiness. Before he could stop them, before he realized, tears gathered and spilled out, the emotions hitting him much harder than he thought.

Muraki lifted his head breaking their kiss, surprise registered on his face, a taste of salt on his lips.

"You're crying, Asato? Why? What is it?" he asked, concerned, touching the wetness with gentle fingertips.

Violets blinked. "Wha-?"

_I'm crying now?! Damn!_

He hated being so sensitive! His emotions always seemed to come to the surface whenever his heart was moved. He couldn't help it! And now Muraki must think him weak...pathetic.

"I...I can't help it!" he exclaimed in a burst. Another embarrasment as far as he was concerned. "I...don't know why...I seem to...fall apart!"

"Shh, Asato," Muraki soothed, pressing kiss after warm kiss against Tsuzuki's cheek, temple and mouth. "Don't upset yourself so..."

"But I don't...want you to see me...this way," Tsuzuki sniffled, his hands grasping the silver blond's shoulders. "To see me so...weak..."

Muraki lifted his head a bit to better look at the guardian, a loving smile. "Never that, Asato. You are strong because you are vulnerable," he said softly. With his hand, he inched his way down the brunet's thigh to a smooth rounded ass cheek and dug his nails into the soft skin.

"OH!" Taken by surprise, violets blinked. "Kaz-Kazutaka!"

Muraki smiled in delight. His dexterous fingers kneaded the firm buttock. "I love that about you, Asato. Your feelings so close..." Seeing Tsuzuki relax his body, Muraki took advantage and settled between the brunet's thighs, their groins nestled together, groaning.

A new experience for Tsuzuki.

Letting out a soft cry, Tsuzuki fell fully against the mattress, his legs widening further. It was incredible! His hot blood-filled penis rubbing against Muraki's own engorged erection. Panting, Tsuzuki gyrated his hips, the delicious friction spurring him on. Muraki helped by counter-moving against the brunet's, both men moaning their combined pleasure. Tsuzuki nails making tracks down the silver blond's broad back, sweat dewing his heaving chest. Muraki leaned down to lap up the popping droplets, then pulled away.

"No! Kazutaka!" Tsuzuki cried out, desperate. "Don't go!" His fingers clawed the other man's slick back.

Muraki winced a bit, surprised by the brunet's aggressiveness...yet...

_His demon nature is coming through. Asato's darkness..._

With a growl, he fell back down, Muraki smothered Tsuzuki's mouth, his tongue tangling the pink muscle within, his hips grinding hard and fast, loving the little mewls of rapture Tsuzuki was giving.

_Yes, yes, yes..._

Tsuzuki's mind chanted his elation, his moans suppressed by the bruising kiss, his groin never having received such stimulation. Catching his breath, Tsuzuki jerked his head away panting, brows furrowed in concentration, exerting his lower half into a frantic rocking motion, cock against cock.

_So good...so good..._

Muraki's heavy hot body pinning his to the firm mattress, his ravenous mouth biting and marking the tender skin of his throat, drove the guardian into a myriad of lust he never thought existed.

"K-kazutaka...I'm...I'm gonna...ohhhhh..."

In a split second, the doctor made his decision. Increasing his tempo, he trapped one of Tsuzuki's hands into his, threading their fingers tight to anchor them both.

"Yesssss," Muraki groaned, hurriedly placing open-mouthed kisses along the smaller man's jaw, his own peak imminent. "Asato...love..." Spurred on by those sex-hazed violets, the silver-blond quickly induced Tsuzuki's climax, pelvis grinding double-time and was rewarded when the brunet cried out softly, an arm reaching up to clasp his shoulder.

Moving his hips weakly, Tsuzuki wrung out his pleasure, now spent over their slick stomachs, smiling as Muraki kissed his cheek numerous times.

"Asato..."

It was quick and explosive and felt so wonderful, taking the edge off of his desire for now. Sighing happily, Tsuzuki squeezed the hand he held.

"Kazutaka...that felt so..."

Muraki let out a shaky breath, pleased that he had decided to slake their lust for the time being. It certainly did the trick in relaxing Tsuzuki as now the brunet was stretching his limbs, his face glowing.

"You liked that, Asato?" he asked, brushing back damp bangs from Tsuzuki's forehead.

"Yeah..." Tsuzuki replied, nodding.

In a blink of an eye, the doctor conjured up a warm washcloth and proceeded to clean the remnants of their passion, wiping carefully and quickly. That done and cloth discarded in thin air, he settled on his side to face the guardian. However, Tsuzuki shifted a bit bringing one leg over to rest on the doctor's thigh urging the silver blond to lay over him.

"I'm too heavy," Muraki insisted. But Tsuzuki shook his head, wrapping his arms around broad shoulders to bring him back. "Don't go. I like it when...when your body's over mine. Feels nice."

Muraki grinned, in full agreement. Settling back down, he turned his head into Tsuzuki's neck, closing his eyes. "This is nice," he whispered, then sighed when he felt fingers comb through his hair. "Very nice."

For several minutes, with only the sound of the ticking bedside clock in the large room, Muraki and Tsuzuki relaxed in each other's arms, long shadows crept across the carpeted floor, the waning sun dipping to the horizon, golden light playing over their naked skin.

Muraki glanced up. "You are so beautiful in this light, Asato," he whispered in wonder, touching the brunet's cheek. "You remind me very much of an ethereal creature from a painting come to life...to spend one passionate night with me, a mere mortal...and afterwards if I were to make the mistake of falling asleep, you'd slip from my arms...every trace that you were ever here gone in a whisper...except in memory..."

Blushing and violets searching the silver blond's face, Tsuzuki's fingers slowed their massage in silver tresses. "Kazutaka..."

The corner of his mouth quirking, Muraki snuggled contentedly, his hand stroking the brunet's pectoral, skimming a nipple. "Forgive me. My mind seems to wander to such things, Asato. I blame my excessive reading of the classics and poetry both now and as a youth. And truth be told, I 'blame' you," he added, slyly. "All sorts of fanciful notions seem to spring to mind when I'm near you...or thinking of you which is quite often. And now...seeing you nude in twilight...well..."

Tsuzuki smiled shyly, rubbing his chin on the top of the silver blond's head. "I've always been interested in poetry and music and art," he mused.

"Then allow me to introduce that to you as well," Muraki offered. He lifted his chin to better look at the guardian. "I can open up new worlds to you, Asato. We can travel to different places, experience different cultures. I can read aloud to you by firelight, everything from classical to modern." Warming to the subject, the doctor shifted his body up from Tsuzuki's to lie next to him and turned the brunet to face him. Cupping his cheek, Muraki continued. "Concerts, museums, restaurants...there's so much I want to show you, Asato. Art, music, travel, food, wine..."

Violets turned saucer-wide.

"I have the means to do so, Asato," Muraki said. "We can go anywhere in the world. Walk the beaches of Monte Carlo, stroll the boardwalks of Paris, drink the wines from the vineyards in Tuscany..."

"I...I don't know what to say," Tsuzuki retorted, overwhelmed. "I'd love that, Kazutaka. I would love going anywhere with you. But, at the same time, just being here like this...it's good too."

Muraki smiled. "We are lovers now, Asato. And as lovers, I want to do these things for you. I want you with me always," he stated. Stroking Tsuzuki's warm cheek with the back of his fingers, his tone grew serious, silvers glittering in the low light. "Live with me."

"Kazutaka..."

"Asato!" A fierce plea. "Do you think I could let you go after this night?!"

Tsuzuki gasped and lowered his eyes, cheeks blooming pink.

"Lovers," he whispered. "We're lovers now..." Just saying the word out loud warmed his heart.

_I have a lover..._

"Yes, Asato. Lovers," the doctor's tone grew tender. "And I want my lover by my side. I want my lover walking in the garden, reading in the living room, preparing meals in the kitchen, bathing in the bathroom, sleeping in the bedroom...making love to me in our bed."

Tsuzuki had to agree, had to say yes. This was the natural course to take, especially since their love was mutually confessed. Muraki was confident in that.

"I want your beautiful face to be the first thing I behold in the morning, Asato. And the last when I close my eyes at night."

Love, happiness, relief seeped into the guardian's bones, radiating like sunshine from the inside out. Of course they would live together, share meals and sleep together in the same house. Why it hadn't occurred to Tsuzuki before, he didn't know. Violets darted around the semi-dark room, from the walnut bureau on the left side to the two high-back chairs and writing desk on the right side and all the other decor in between.

"It's so big, Kazutaka. This house is so...huge!"

"Then you agree?" Muraki asked, a little anxiously. Despite telling himself he was sure the guardian would consent, he couldn't help but feel sparks of nervous tension skittering in his belly.

Violets brightened.

"Yeah...yeah, I'll live with you, Kazutaka," he answered, clasping the silver blond's hand, his heart thumping. "I want to see you first thing in the morning too."

Muraki let out a breath and a prayer of thanks. "Good," he said. "Very good." He smiled then unable to contain himself, burst into a laugh and pulled the guardian to him. "I'm so very glad, Asato."

Tsuzuki returned the hug, a laugh of his own bubbling from his throat in delight. Looking over Muraki's shoulder he turned his head, looking around. "It'll probably take me a week to find my way around," he joked. "Maybe I should draw myself a map until I know my way around?"

Muraki shook his head, pulling away to look into violets. "No need. I won't let you out of my sight for a while. AND we'll be spending a majority of our time in bed so, actually, you only need to know your way from bedroom to bathroom and back again."

Tsuzuki blushed at the mention of bedtime activities, erotic scenes coming into play.

"B-but I'll need to eat!" protesting right back, propping himself on his elbow to better 'glare' at his lover.

"Ahh, technically, you are a Shinigami and as such you do not need sustenance," Muraki reminded the guardian. Smirking, eyelids half-hooded, his fingers skimmed down Tsuzuki's bare chest, tickling. "And as I will be keeping you well occupied, Asato, all thoughts of such trivial matters will be the farthest thing from your mind..."

Tsuzuki struggled to sit up. "N-now Kazutaka..." he sputtered, suddenly turning shy but still in a jesting mood. "I-I don't know about that...I do like my sweets..."

Muraki grinned, appreciating Tsuzuki's humor and seized the brunet by the arms, rolling onto his back. A surprised Tsuzuki blinked over him.

"What I am about to do to you now, Asato, will be better than any sweet," he whispered, silvers twinkling.

TBC

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A/N: Thanks for reading and reviewing! It helps me a lot to see what you like or dislike about the story. Next chapter on the way! Until then! :)


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I do not own Yami no Matsuei. And it pisses me off. Grr.

A/N: Hi all! All my blatherings as why this took so damn long is at that end. For now...Enjoy!

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"You ARE sensitive here, Asato," the silver blond whispered, assessing the slick puckered nipple before him. Kissing it, his hand glided down the olive-toned chest to rest on the taut abdomen muscles that were now quivering under his fingertips.

Tsuzuki groaned, his body squirming on the mattress, his own fingers grasping in silver hair. How long had Muraki been kissing and savoring his helpless body like this? The minutes seemed to meld into an uncountable number in his pleasure-induced brain, especially when the silver blond honed in on his nipples, kissing and biting each one as though they were a delicacy. And since Muraki had set out to show him that there were sweeter things to be had than the cookies and cakes the brunette had been consuming, the silver blonde was, indeed, proving his point quite well.

Now, Muraki was nibbling his flat stomach while one white hand caressed his chest and the other slid around to his back. Tsuzuki gave a soft tug to the silver tresses, his fingers twirling around and around the silken strands.

"Ka-kazutaka...I...I..."

Muraki lifted his head, a question wrinkling his brow.

"Asato?"

He noted the guardian's beautiful flushed features and bit back his query. No need to ask Tsuzuki what was wrong. Or right in this case. It was clear to the doctor that his beloved was overwhelmed...overheated. Certainly nothing wrong with that but Muraki held himself in check.

He was determined to prolong the man's pleasure for his first time. Of course, Muraki wanted nothing more than to devour the beautiful guardian until they were both mindless and spent. But that would come afterwards in the days ahead.

Tonight was for Tsuzuki.

"Kazutaka...I...it feels so good...I never thought...I mean..." Tsuzuki swallowed hard and struggled to lift himself up by the elbows. No use. He fell back down, sighing.

Muraki chuckled softly pulling up to face Tsuzuki. Leaning close, he nipped the brunette's chin.

It is overwhelming, ne? he asked, grey eyes shimmering. He loomed over the slender brunette, careful not to put his full weight upon the man. "To the body and senses. This night is not meant to be rushed, Asato. I want our first time together to be...memorable."

Tsuzuki blinked in astonishment. How very different from what Tsuzuki imagined a night with Muraki would be. Even Watari's warning about what to expect, that he may have to argue with the doctor to take precautions faded with the Muraki's words. His astonished expression must have shown on his face. Muraki's silver brows quirked.

"You are surprised, Asato?" he asked. He reached out to brush wayward locks of chestnut hair from violet eyes.

A blush.

"Well...just that...I was kind of expecting and was told that it would be...like you said...overwhelming. And...painful," he concluded softly, shifting his weight on the mattress, a bit embarrassed. But he was advised by Watari to let the doctor know his concerns because it was his first sexual encounter. Would the sophisticated man brush aside his worries?

"It can be," Muraki nodded, his fingers now combing through soft strands. "One's first time can be painful IF one's lover is unconcerned with his partner's care and comfort. However, I promise you, Asato, that I WILL take care of you." Finding Tsuzuki's hand, the silver blond threaded their fingers together, squeezing for emphasis. "And be assured I WILL take my time."

Violets widened along with a sharp gasp. "Oh! Well...good! I mean...yeah! Good!"

Muraki let out a laugh. Grinning, he leaned down to kiss the guardian's lips. "I'm glad you are agreeable, Asato," he murmured. "Now...put your arms around me. Hold me close. Let me feel you."

Tsuzuki swallowed. "All right."

_I told him I trusted him. And I do trust him. I can't help but feel that...he wouldn't hurt me..._

Reaching up, the guardian slowly twined his arms around Muraki's broad shoulders, pulling the doctor's body atop him fully. Blood roared in his ears, the thrill of Muraki's naked skin in contact with his. Closing his eyes, the brunette's brain scrambled at the headiness of what was happening.

At times, in the recesses of his mind, Tsuzuki's imaginings would wander to various scenarios of erotic settings where he and various beautiful partners would commit sinfully delicious sexual couplings...

But before Muraki, before meeting this charismatic man, the faces of Tsuzuki's fantasies would be blank canvases, just beautiful bodies.

And now...having met the silver blonde all his fantasies consisted of sparkling silver eyes, glossy platnium hair, alabaster skin. And in those fantasies, Tsuzuki had often wondered what Muraki's body would feel like, if his skin was just as milk white underneath, if his frame was lanky or muscular. And now holding the man close the guardian knew. Muraki's body was all of that and more. A combination of strength and leanness and smooth silk.

"You...you feel good," he whispered, then buried his face against the silver blond's shoulder, a shiver running along his veins.

"You my dear Asato...you feel wonderful," Muraki whispered back, gliding his hands up and down the smaller man's naked back. "So much strength in these limbs and yet...delicate at the same time..."

Tsuzuki looked up, a bit surprised. "Is that how you see me, Kazutaka?" he asked softly wanting to know what the doctor saw in him. "When I look in the mirror I just see...me. Nothing special..."

"Asato, Asato," the silver blonde chastised, taking the man's chin between his fingers. "You ARE special. Very special. I wish you could see yourself as I do. A beautiful man, full of exhuburance, laughter, warmth. A man who possesses such rare violet eyes that one could easily get lost in..."

Tsuzuki listened to the doctor's description of him with disbelief, his cheeks growing hotter by the second.

_He sees me like that? I thought I was just kind of ordinary...I don't know what I thought really...To hear him say that I'm...special..._

Happiness, pride bloomed but more than anything, embarrasment. So much so, Tsuzuki shook his head wildly.

"I'm not! You're just saying th-"

Muraki stopped the rest of the guardian's protest with a heart-stopping kiss. It didn't take long for Tsuzuki to respond as he tightened his hold around the silver blonde's shoulders for support. Groaning softly, the guardian swirled his tongue with the other, excitement throbbing.

"I mean every word I say, Asato," Muraki murmured between kisses. "Please believe me when I tell you...you are a beautiful *kiss* exciting *kiss* fascinating *kiss* vibrant *kiss*..."

"Ka-kazutaka...mmmm...b-but...mmmphmm," Tsuzuki tried his best to keep up with the compliments bestowed, but it was rather difficult when each was followed by the pressure of warm lips against his own.

"Graceful *kiss* strong *kiss* beautiful *kiss*..."

Tsuzuki smiled, a giggle bubbling forth. "You...you said that..."

Muraki, silver eyes glazed, blinked. "Did I? It bears repeating, ne? Beautiful *kiss* beautiful *kiss*..."

Merriment danced in the brunette's eyes and he couldn't help laughing. Undeterred, Muraki concentrated on the brunette's neck his voice muffled as he continued his litany.

"Funny *kiss* silly *kiss* beautiful*..."

Both men fell back against the bed laughing. Tsuzuki wiped the tears from his eyes feeling much more relaxed. And surprised at seeing this side of the doctor. Smile fading, Muraki pulled up close. Silver eyes intense, Tsuzuki own grin disappeared, realizing what was about to happen. Muraki kissed him.

"Mmmmm.."

Their tongues massaged, entertwined, chasing each other within their mouths as Tsuzuki's body broke into a fever. His legs fell open to let Muraki settle between his slick thighs. Groin aching, the slender cock aroused and hot, he rubbed hard against the silver blonde's torso, pleasure burst at discovering this new sensation.

Playfulness gave way to lust.

Muraki's hands ran down the length of the brunette's back, his palms coming to rest and kneaded the firm ass roughly. Tsuzuki tore his mouth away panting heavily, whimpering when nails dug into his soft skin only to have his mouth caught and plundered, his moans muffled. Instinctively, he gyrated his hips, a delicious friction generating. Stretching one long leg out and planting his foot on the mattress, the guardian attempted to bounce his hips, wanting more leverage against the hard body above him.

Growling, Muraki grabbed at the leg, pushing it down. Lifting his head, breathing hard, he raised himself at the waist, staring down, he looked almost savage.

"Asato..." he groaned. Biting his lip, Muraki ground his pelvis with force giving in to what Tsuzuki wanted. Crying out, Tsuzuki panted, his sweating body writhing to receive maximum pleasure.

_So good...more...more!_

Then it stopped. Violet eyes snapped open.

"Ka-kazutaka...?

Reaching down, Muraki fingers sought his lover's small entrance and once found, slipped in one long digit, in and out.

"Ohhhhh...wh-what are you...ohhhhh..."

Tsuzuki arched his back, beads of sweat popping and rolling down his chest. Unable to resist the naked chest heaving in front of him, Muraki leaned forward, catching the errant droplets, scraping his tongue on naked skin while his finger probed his lover's tight inner muscles. A second finger followed, thrusting a little faster, delving a little deeper.

Tsuzuki's cock sprang up in response to the deep prodding. When he felt another invader, his muscles clamped hard around it. Squirming, Tsuzuki moaned loudly, his face flush, strands of dark hair sticking against his forehead and cheeks. He began to thrust in time to the finger-fucking, tossing his neck back.

Why had he waited so long to do this? Watari never mentioned it could be like this! Nothing could have prepared the brunette to such sensations, his nerve endings tingled promising something more...he felt on the verge of losing control, of giving something up only to gain something much more delightful...meaningful.

Delerious, taking in lungfuls of air, Tsuzuki strained reaching for his cock to stroke himself. Muraki grabbed his wrist, pinning it above the guardian's head.

"Asato..."

Muraki removed his slick fingers. It was time. The silver blonde's own self control was barely in check at seeing Tsuzuki's beautiful body writhing on rumpled sheets, every muscle taut. How many times had he dreamed of this very scenario, Tsuzuki in his bed naked and hot wanting him, he couldn't say.

"No, no, no..." Tsuzuki whimpered at the deprivation bringing Muraki back to the situation at hand. Shimmering violets welled up. "Kazutaka..."

Muraki's breath hitched, his heart skipping a beat. Quickly, Muraki conjured up a small jar. Dipping his fingers, he rubbed the substance on his rigid cock, oiling it from root to crown. Tsuzuki watched, violets half-hooded focused on his lover's large erection, inner muscles twitching impatiently. He licked his lips, marveling at the length, the girth and thickness of it, how incredible it would feel deep inside him, thrusting hard and fast, making him scream.

How it would feel between his lips...feeling the weight of it on his tongue...?

Excitement replaced fear. Hesistation was replaced by a wanton need to be filled to the hilt. His inner demon had awakened, lusting, hungry for completion...for his mate.

"Kazutaka...hurry...please..." Tsuzuki fell back against the mattress, rolling his hips. "I want you...Now..."

Blushing, but unable to help it, Tsuzuki spread his legs wider, his own leaking cock flat against his stomach. He didn't know what had gotten into him and he was vaguely aware he was behaving shamelessly but at this moment he didn't care. All that matter was being taken by the man he loved and how right it all felt.

Muraki groaned at the beautiful sight. The demon inside him growling in approval as if to say:

_Yes. At last...Our most beloved one...Our mate..._

The silver blonde positioned the tip of his cock to the puckered opening. Not breaking his gaze, Muraki pushed the crown in, holding back. Although the brunette was desperate for it, he restrained himself from ramming full force especially for Tsuzuki's first time. That would come later. Now, the silver blonde paused, sweat running down his white skin, chest rising and falling. With one hand, he pushed down the brunette's knee for better penetration and pushed deep.

A sob then a cry ripped from Tsuzuki's throat.

_It hurts!_

Tears cascaded from the corner of his eyes, the pressure too much. He practically scrambled to get away. Muraki's fingers dug into his hips, stilling him.

"Asato!"

Startled, Tsuzuki looked up, eyes blurred. He swiped the back of his hand over his tearing eyes.

"Asato," Muraki repeated, voice gentle, grimacing a bit. "It is painful, I know. But I will make it better...much better. Please trust me."

Tsuzuki hesitated for a fraction of a second, then nodded. "All right," he whispered. He winced, it felt like his guts were being ripped in two. How could it get better? But...Muraki said to trust him.

Taking a deep breath, the pain indeed lessening by a few degress, Tsuzuki closed his eyes.

"I'm ready."

Muraki couldn't help but smile. It was though the brunette was preparing for battle the way his face took on a determined look. But he knew his Tsuzuki was couragous. Taking a breath of his own, Muraki pushed forward, unable to keep the groan from coming forth.

Tsuzuki was so tight! Biting his lip, the silver blonde proceeded, massaging a supple ass cheek to try to distract the brunette. So wonderful! Constricted inner muscles squeezing his cock like a hot hand. Was Tsuzuki even aware that he was doing it? Muraki caught his breath as an intense ripple of pleasure radiating from his groin. Shutting his eyes the silver blonde's body shuddered, fingers gripping the brunette's hips for support.

"Yesssss..."

Tsuzuki blinked up not understanding why Muraki stilled his movements.

"Kazutaka...?" he asked. The pain had diminished considerably and now he was ready for more. Muraki opened his eyes, the pupils dilating.

"Incredible," he gasped. "Asato...you have...no idea, do you?"

Ignoring the guardian's puzzled look, Muraki pushed further in. Tsuzuki fidgeted choking back a shout. So much! The pain coming back even more than before. But he would see this through. Muraki promised him pleasure, promised him it would be better. And then...

With a sudden push, Muraki was buried fully, the sound of naked skin slapping in the still room. Tsuzuki gasped sharply. The pain...has it? It has! It stopped! It completely stopped! There was that fullness, somewhat uncomfortable but it wasn't unbearable. In fact...

Experimenting, Tsuzuki gave a tentative shove of his own. What was that...? It tingled and it felt kind of...good. He tried again, his pelvis making a small bounce, hoping to touch whatever it was deep inside that sent that small shock.

Muraki, encouraged, happy to see the brunette instigating, took over and pulled out part ways only to thrust back in again hard.

"OH!"

Pleasure bloomed, that incredible friction. With a snap of his hips Muraki proceeded to set a steady rhythm, raking his nails over Tsuzuki's thighs. Droplets of sweat here and there pelted the brunette as his lover's body pistoned over him.

"Unnghhh..." Tsuzuki helped. Anything to keep this going, he would do. It was incredible...it was feeling...marvelous now! A bit of discomfort but that only served to enhance this experience. Muraki opened up Tsuzuki's flexible body wider pinning one knee on the mattress and speeded up the tempo, his pale buttocks flexing with each movement.

"Asato...you...you like this? Feels good now...?" he had to ask. It excited Muraki to see his dark-haired lover taking him all in, who was now keening with pleasure and straining against him.

"Yeah...ohhhhh...yeah..." Tsuzuki's hooded violets glazed over. "More...more..."

As his lover commands. With a grunt, Muraki did exactly that. Leaning over the writhing body, Muraki pierced his lover with short rapid thrusts, angling Tsuzuki's hips just so. Bowing his head, he hurried them both to that pinnacle, so close now. Tsuzuki cried out, shocks of electricty tripled. Something inside him was doing this, some pleasure spot Muraki was hitting again and again deep inside him was making him see stars. Frantic, mindless with lust, Tsuzuki kept up as best he could, racing toward that end. Reaching his arms out, he whimpered suddenly wanting his lover close. Muraki responded at once.

Hugging his lover tight, their sweating chests pressed, Muraki kept up the staccato pace, gritting his teeth and tumbled over that pinnacle. Being so close to the edge it didn't take long and soon both men shouted in unison, clinging to each other, their bodies convulsing.

Tsuzuki sobbed his release, his seed spilling over their stomachs, his lover's warm seed filling him. Wringing out the last tremors, Tsuzuki gripped his lovers shoulders then collapsed, feeling as though every bone in his body turned liquid.

Muraki rained kisses over his lover's flushed face; on his neck, cheeks, temple.

"Asato...Asato..." he whispered, his heart fit to bursting. "My love...my only love..."

For Muraki it had been nothing short of a...miracle. That was the only word he could use to describe this feeling of completeness and belonging. His past...his sorrow...oblierated in those estatic moments with this beautiful violet-eyed creature. He smiled, his soul soaring above, touching the deep blue sky...the wide expanse of universe.

Tsuzuki closed his eyes, catching his breath, receiving his lover's kisses and endearments. He couldn't speak...could barely put two words together. If he had any doubts before, any worries or fears or anxities about being with Muraki...all of that vanished into nothingness as though those concerns had never been. Tsuzuki, now, laying sweaty and spent and happy beyond anything he had ever known, knew with every fiber of his soul that he belonged with Muraki.

_I am his and he is mine..._

"Kazutaka..." he started, gazing into silvers with wonder. "I love you."

He wasn't too weary to say that.

Muraki reverently caressed his lover's cheek with the back of his fingers. "I love you, Asato."

Tsuzuki closed his eyes, exhaustion seeping into brain. Wanting to say so much more, how he felt, what this night meant, did Muraki enjoy it too...so much to discuss but feeling much too drowsy now...

"Sleep, Asato," Muraki gently coaxed, fingers brushing away strands of dark hair from the smooth forehead. He smiled as his lover struggled to keep his eyelids open. "Shhh. Go to sleep. I'll be here when you wake. So sleep and have no fears."

Tsuzuki sighed and murmured something which the doctor couldn't quite catch.

"That's it, Asato. Sleep and we will meet in dreams...no fears for either of us...not anymore...beloved..."

_Beloved_

Dark brows knitted at the word. Did he hear right? No. Such a precious word to bestow upon one who is dearly loved.

_Beloved_

No. He was sure he imagined it...

* * *

When Tsuzuki awoke, the first thing he noticed was the softness underneath him...under his head, back, and buttocks. It was like laying on a billowy cloud. His bed didn't feel this comfortable or luxurious. Not by a long shot. Bit by bit things started to register. An ornate dark mahogony bedpost...a lamp topped with a light blue shade...curtains on a window made of a gauzy filmy material.

Then he noticed how his body ached; his back, thighs...as though he battled or did something strenuous...

_Oh!_

Memories of what took place came rushing back. Quickly, he turned his head to the other side. And there...

_Kazutaka_

Silver hair tangled, a face too beautiful for words in repose, bare muscular chest breathing with regularity.

Tsuzuki stared. All the love he felt for the man overflowed. So much so tears sprang forth. Tsuzuki passed a hand over his eyes, a little chagrined at himself for being so emotional. And yet he couldn't help it. He harbored no regrets, no misgivings. None. How could he? He came to Muraki of his own free will and of his own free will he would accept anything that came as a result of it.

_Because I love him_

Turning to his side, bed clothes rustling, the brunette gazed at his lover.

_My lover_

Tsuzuki smiled. He vaugley noticed that it was somewhat semi-dark, dawn not making its way for a few hours yet. That was fine. It gave Tsuzuki an opportunity to study the man. Violets darted here and there. Then he focused on the shape of Muraki's deep-set eyes, silver brows arched and slender, delicate lashes of silver and black; long straight aristocratic nose; strong cheekbones; lips that were neither too thick or too thin, the bottom one a plump cushion...each feature strong by itself. Put together...well, it was enough to make Tsuzuki's heart flutter and groin ache.

And the urge to touch propelled Tsuzuki to stretch a hand out. Scooting closer he did just that. With the tip of his finger he traced that bottom lip from corner to corner, fascinated. Soft and pillowy...

Muraki took in a deep breath, startling the brunette. The doctor slowly opened his eyes. When focused on Tsuzuki, Muraki's face lit up. Smiling widely, he ensnared Tsuzuki in his arms.

"Asato..." he whispered huskily. Before Tsuzuki could reply, the silver blonde kissed him warmly in greeting. Pulling back, Muraki eyes searched his lover's face. "How are you? Do you feel sore?"

"Oh, a little," Tsuzuki answered. "Actually, I feel...pretty...great," he gave a cheeky grin.

Laughing, Muraki brushed back chestnut hair from the guardian's blushing face. "I am glad to hear that. And for the record, I, too, feel great."

Each caught the other's eye. The silver blonde's hand moved against his lover's nape.

"No regrets, Asato?" he had to ask. He wanted to be sure Tsuzuki hadn't changed his mind about him, hadn't realized that everything had been a horrible mistake. But if Tsuzuki said he was feeling great...

"None," Tsuzuki said firmly, shaking his head. "No regrets. I love you, Kazutaka. I couldn't be more sure of that. Last night proved to me...well, that you care and that you love me too."

"I do," Muraki said emphatically. "With all my heart. Last night changed so much for me as well, beloved."

Tsuzuki stilled. A faint recollection of Muraki saying that word to him just as he was falling asleep.

He hadn't imagined it.

"Beloved?" he whispered. "Why...why do you call me that?"

Muraki cupped his lover's cheek.

"That is what you are to me, Asato," he answered with sincerity and with no hesitation. "My dear and most beloved one."

It was a lovely endearment, precious and heartfelt. And that Muraki treasured Tsuzuki above all else to call him such touched the brunette more than he could say. Tears glimmered on the edge about to spill over. Noticing this, Muraki kissed his forehead.

"Beloved. Now, now, there is no need for tears, ne? I only speak the truth," he smiled hearing his lover sniffle.

_Too adorable!_

"I...I know. And *sniff* I'm not crying!" Tsuzuki exclaimed which earned another chuckle. "I'm just...happy you think that of me."

Muraki brushed an errant tear away and brought the sheet up to snug Tsuzuki in better.

"I do. And I always will. Now, it will be several hours yet until morning. Are you hungry?" he asked. "I could have something delivered or perhaps something from the kitchen?"

"I'm fine, Kazutaka," Tsuzuki assured. He watched as Muraki waved a hand to light a small candle situated on the nightstand. A soft glow warmed the room.

"Beloved...when did you know...that you loved me?" Muraki asked. It something that he had wondered ever since Tsuzuki had said the words. Now that he knew that Tsuzuki desired him for quite a while he was curious as to when that turned to love.

Dark brows furrowed in thought.

"Well, it's not as though I knew all of sudden," Tsuzuki explained. The silver blonde reached for his hand, interlacing their fingers. "I think I was fascinated with you the first time I met you," He blushed. "Standing in that church..."

Muraki nodded. "I see. I took your breath away," he stated, his tone serious.

Tsuzuki grinned at the way he put it. "Yeah...you did." Violets shone at the memory.

"But you also frustrated and infuriated me too. It wasn't love at first sight but...I couldn't stop thinking about you. I thought about you more than I thought about anybody ever. Yeah, you were fascinating. But you were also insufferable and arrogant and presumptious..."

Muraki quirked a brow.

"Even though I had to do my job and bring you to justice...I couldn't help but wonder about you as a person. Why you did the things you did...and I couldn't help but feel...we were somewhat the same..."

"Did you?" Muraki brushed back dark bangs to better see those amethysts.

"Yeah. Like I wondered if you lived with anyone and if you did, who. I remember one time I followed you from the hospital..."

Muraki's brows shot up. "You did? When was this?"

"A week or so after we battled at Sapporo. Curiosity got the better of me so I decided I'd follow you and see where you went, who you met up with. I kept telling myself it was for the sake of the investigation, that I would report what I found out. But I didn't tell anyone at the Bureau. Not Tatsumi or Watari...not even Hisoka, my partner."

The silver blonde was astonished. He had no idea Tsuzuki held any interest in him. So much so that he followed him from work. All this time he assumed it wasn't until after the Kyoto incident was he able to approach Tsuzuki on a personal level.

"So I snuck some of Watari's cloaking potion and staked out the hospital. It was a little before midnight when you came out," Tsuzuki continued. "And you walked home. I was surprised you didn't drive. I stayed some distance away but...I noticed that you didn't linger or look around. You didn't meet anyone or stop off anywhere..."

Muraki nodded, remembering that as well. He sighed then started when he felt Tsuzuki's hand on his cheek.

"Asato?"

"I followed you down a sakura pathway. There was hardly any people, two or three, if that. I remember how cold it was, the wind biting into my skin and how glad I was I wore my heavier coat. And...and I hoped you had a heavy coat on too..."

Muraki trembled. He brought his hand up to his cheek to squeeze Tsuzuki's hand.

"I couldn't understand why I was so concerned about whether or not you had on a warm coat! I was confused but I just dismissed it and continued to trail you...And then... you stopped walking," violets shimmered. "You were a little off the path and just stood next to a sakura tree and...I waited. I thought you were going to meet someone but...no one came. Nothing happened..."

Muraki closed his eyes, sighing deeply.

He remembered.

It was a night like any other. A lone walk home from work. Another night to plan what his next move would be against the Shinigami. But more than anything Tsuzuki would have been uppermost in his thoughts. Ways to hurt and torment the guardian. But when he allowed his thoughts to truly wander and go beneath the thick rage...he would have been thinking of Tsuzuki as a man. Not a Shinigami or an enemy that must be defeated or a tool to be used toward his revenge...but merely as a man he was deeply attracted to. A man he wanted to know more about.

"Beloved..." Muraki started, telling Tsuzuki of what his mind set was back then.

"Really, Kazutaka?" The brunette's violets widened. With Muraki's nod, Tsuzuki continued his narrative.

"I followed you a few more times then. I didn't tell anyone. Not even to this day. I knew I was going against regulations but I didn't care. And that day...after calling down Touda..."

Muraki turned his head to give a fierce kiss against his lover's palm. Tsuzuki gave a sad smile.

"After that I...I don't remember too much. My friends were around me, tending to me. My mind drifted...I didn't want to think about anything. I wanted to forget. And yet...I dreamed of you...your face in my dreams. And...I...I wasn't afraid. I let myself think of you and...it gave me peace somehow. I didn't think it too strange that I would be thinking of you when I felt I had lost everything. And I couldn't help but wonder what...what happened to you...if you had...died. I didn't want that. In spite of everything that happened between us...I hoped with all my heart that you didn't die..."

"Asato," Muraki pulled Tsuzuki into a fierce hug. Salty tears rolled down his pale cheeks. What his lover confessed moved him like nothing else. To think that Tsuzuki cared for him despite all the suffering he had inflicted on the guardian...it was too much.

Tsuzuki hugged his lover hard. He hadn't confessed that to anyone. Not Hisoka or even Watari. At the time it too shameful to reveal that he harbored tender feelings for the evil doctor. But by telling Muraki now drew the two closer together.

"I knew I loved you when you came to me and declared you put your past behind. That you wanted no more revenge...you sought me out knowing the risk of your being killed just to tell me that you were a different man. No one believed you. I was afraid to...but...my heart hoped. And my heart fell in love..."

Muraki couldn't take it. He just didn't deserve this man. Burying his face against his lover's neck, shoulders shaking, he wept.

Tsuzuki held tight to his lover, his own eyes brimming over. After several minutes, when the last of tremors subsided, in Muraki's hand was a tailored handkerchief which he used for his eyes and face. He procured a clean one for Tsuzuki.

"I...I am sorry, Asato..." Muraki started but was taken aback when the brunette protested.

"No! Don't be sorry, Kazutaka! Don't be sorry about showing your feelings to me," Tsuzuki passed a hand over his eyes. "We should be able to now that...now that we're lovers."

Muraki smiled. "Yes, beloved. You are right, of course. Being with you, I do feel I can tell you anything," he sighed. "To know that you cared about me even then, even when I caused you so much torment..."

The brunette hushed his lover on that point by kissing him. It was much too deep a subject to delve into just now. Later, they would. But for right now, Tsuzuki wanted to focus on their happiness. Muraki responded, returning and delighting in it. His hands stroking his lover's naked back, one hand caressing the nape of his neck. Tsuzuki groaned.

"Tomorrow morning..." Muraki whispered, his lips nibbling at a smooth cheeck. "You will pack your clothes, belongings and whatever else you wish to take and bring them here. And then we will have a little homecoming party to celebrate your new living arrangments. How does that sound?"

Tsuzuki swallowed. "My home."

Silver eyes glimmered. "Yes, beloved. Your home. If you wish, that is," he held his breath.

Crazy. It was ridiculous he knew, but he had a wild crazy notion - even though the brunette agreed - that Tsuzuki had changed his mind about the whole thing. Much to his relief and happiness, the brunette's violets brightened.

"Yeah, I wish that," Tsuzuki confirmed. His mind worked over what he owned and realized with a pang that he didn't possess that much. He was about to remark that but gave a sharp gasp instead.

Muraki had heaved himself on top of Tsuzuki, silver eyes gazing at the guardian with a mixture of amusement, love, and lust.

"What else do you wish, beloved?" he asked as he lowered his naked body, touching skin to skin. They both sighed. Tsuzuki gripped his lover's shoulders, his cock coming to life. The brunette tried hard to focus on the question posed.

"T-to live...live with you...and...and..." he gulped, face growing hot. A breathy moan escaped his lips when Muraki shifted his body down a couple of inches causing delicious friction.

"Yes. But...there must be...something else...you want...beloved..." Muraki insisted, his own breath hitching. He nibbled Tsuzuki's neck, making his way down to a copper nipple. Capturing it, he lapped and suckled delighting in his lover's whimpers.

"Ohhhh..." Tsuzuki's tangled his fingers in silver hair. "I...I want you to..." Tossing his dark head, he let out another loud moan as his lover's tongued his way across to the other nipple giving it the same lusty attention.

What was he going to ask? His brain was short-circuiting something terrible. And then it hit him. What he wanted, what he longed for. But how to declare it?

"What, beloved? Hmmm?" Muraki questioned between licks. His hands stroked warm olive-toned skin, marveling at the silkiness of it. "Tell me...please. I want to...make you happy..."

"You do!" Tsuzuki exclaimed, startling them both.

Bringing up Tsuzuki's hand, Muraki kissed the slim knuckles. "Everything I do is an expression of my love for you, Asato. The last thing I want is for you to be fearful of me. Given the past I understand your hesitation-"

"It isn't that! I trust you, Kazutaka!" Tsuzuki insisted, vehemently. "I wouldn't be here if I didn't!"

Muraki smiled.

"I'm just...shy!" Tsuzuki felt his face heat up. So much so that it wouldn't surprise him if he burst into flames. "I've never...I mean...I've never been or done...and to ask for..." He groaned in shame, laying his arm across his eyes.

_Dammit!_

"I love you, Asato."

Tsuzuki stilled.

"I love you, Asato Tsuzuki. And because I love you, I would never mock or shame or humilate you when we are together like this or any other time. Never. I give you my word. So ask anything of me, beloved..."

Tsuzuki removed his arm, violets blinking up and staring into a face so serious, he had no reason to doubt the doctor's declaration.

"Kazutaka..." Tsuzuki gave a sunny smile, his heart throbbing with renewed adoration. "Thank you..."

Muraki leaned in for a kiss, a symbol of his promise to the guardian. Pulling away, he continued what he had started and began kissing and nibbling the smooth chest, lapping at the goosebumps popping up. Encouraged by Tsuzuki's moans, Muraki savored the young man's delectable flesh, even giving a bite here and there as he made his way downward, from nipples to ribcage to bellybutton.

Tsuzuki's legs splayed of their own accord, his whole body squirming.

"Kazutaka..." Tsuzuki's voice strained. "I want you...to...to..." Blushing to the roots of his hair, Tsuzuki was determined. Shyness be damned. "Kiss me and...and...suck me...please..."

Muraki closed his eyes, shivers resonated throughout his body at the request, lust spiking tenfold. He wrapped his fingers around the root of the slender cock, anchoring it. Through half-hooded eyes, the doctor licked his lips, quivering in anticipation.

"Kazutaka...please..." Tsuzuki moaned again, impatience and trepidation and embarrasment all rolled into one but so excited that his lover was giving him what he wanted.

_He's going to do it! I always wondered what it would feel like...a lover to kiss me there...suck me...and now it's actually going to...going to._..

"Asato," the silver blonde's husky voice startling Tsuzuki a bit. "I love you. It has always been you. It will always BE you..."

Before the guardian could reply, a gasp tore at his throat. Muraki's hot mouth enveloped his shaft, tongue and lips working feverishly.

Nothing could have prepared Tsuzuki for this. Everything he had been told and heard and read didn't compare one iota to the act itself. How can one put into words the feel of having hot wet suction on the most intimate part of you? There were no words as far as the brunette was concerned. His brain was too muddled for words right now. All there was was sensation...just bliss and pleasure and...heaven.

Tsuzuki tossed his head from side to side on the pillows, whimpering with helpless abandon. Clamping a hand over mouth, he stifled a cry at a particularly hard suck lest he lose himself completely and scream the house down.

But Muraki noticed and discouraged his lover. Running his tongue up the pulsing shaft, he nibbled tenderly at the sticky crown, lips glistening from his lover's juices.

"I want...to hear you...Asato," he groaned, lapping up the steady stream of precum from the cockhead. "Don't hold...anything...back."

Taking Tsuzuki's sex with both hands, Muraki swallowed it down, relishing taste and texture, the weight of it against his tongue and feasting to his heart's content, more than anything happy at hearing his lover's wails.

For Muraki it was a dream come true. Tsuzuki at his most vulnerable, trusting him completely now. How many days and nights he wished for this, he couldn't say. Now, he was making the most of it. He discovered how unique Tsuzuki's juices tasted. The briny/sweet combination teasing his taste buds making him eager for more. Dipping his head lower, he licked a plump testicle then pulled into his hot mouth, rolling it around.

"AAHHHHH!"

"Ka-kazutaka..*pant*...please...I'm...gonna...oh god...*pant*...uuunnnggghhhh...!"

Tsuzuki bucked his sweating body, groaning when his lover's fingers dug into his buttocks in an effort to still him. Babbling, sobbing, Tsuzuki was a mass of nerve endings all sparking to greater heights of pleasure. His lover greedy mouth seemed to want to devour him whole and he didn't care. All that matter was reaching that end.

The silver blonde didn't relinquish in that regard, didn't slow down or show any mercy. He merely worked his tongue and lips over every inch of hot flesh. Tsuzuki wasn't going to last long, he knew. And hearing the way his lover screamed his name like that...Muraki wasn't going to last either. Making up his mind, he doubled his efforts. He sealed Tsuzuki's cockhead with his mouth, using two hands to pump and pull and squeeze the pulsing shaft.

"AAAAAHHHH!"

Back arching, Tsuzuki gave a violent shudder. Thrashing his body this way and that, his climax ripping him apart. Muraki held on, continuing his assault, continuing to keep a tight seal to better drink down the spurts of rich essence his lover was pumping out.

He had been right. Tsuzuki tasted delicious, unique. He made a mental note to drink much of it in the future...

Lifting his head, Muraki's white chest heaved. Eyes at half-mast and glazed, he took in the sight of his lover, sweaty and flushed on the mattress, cock limp and spent between glistening thighs. Dark hair stuck out here and there, long legs splayed...Tsuzuki never looking more beautiful and desireable.

Licking his lips, Muraki prepared himself, palming his own thick cock, his heart speeding.

"Asato..." he groaned, begging. He was so hard, so light-headed with lust. "Please..."

Tsuzuki answered by holding out his arms. Muraki went into the circle of them, tears stinging behind his eyes. The brunette encouraged by holding himself in position, ready to receive.

"I love you, Kazutaka," he whispered. "Take me now..."

Tears spilled forth. A passionate kiss. Then...

His body relaxed from his climax, Tsuzuki's passage opened readily. There was a brush of pain but not like before. Tsuzuki clung on as Muraki took his pleasure, receiving each forceful thrust with happiness, that he was making his lover happy now. Muraki stiffened above him.

"Asato..." A plea through gritted teeth.

A few more violent thrusts and a warm gush coated Tsuzuki's insides, bonding them once again. Muraki's full weight pressed against his small lover, as the silver blonde's body collasped, boneless.

"Kazutaka..."

Muraki instantly rolled to his side, apologetic as he kissed his lover's temple and cheek. Despite his tiredness, the silver blonde tended to Tsuzuki, cleansing him with a warm wash cloth.

Tsuzuki smiled as his lover did so, even biting back a laugh when he thought how convienent magic was at times like this!

Once done, Muraki set about pulling up the covers and pulling Tsuzuki's warm body to him. Tsuzuki sighed, wrapping his arms around his lover's waist, contemplating and drowsy. They caught each other's eye and smiled.

There were still a couple of hours before daybreak. The sky morphing into a greyish blue; birds awakening, a scattered chirping here and there. Tsuzuki relished this feeling, snuggling closer to his lover's strong body. Yawning, eyelids drooping closed, he lifted his head and murmured something in Muraki's ear before sleep took over completely.

Silver eyes glossed over. Muraki murmured his reply in his lover's ear, then buried his face in fragrant dark hair, meeting Tsuzuki in dreams.

* * *

Plum-colored eyes looked around the large room. It was in the bright light of morning that he could better see the ornate yet tasteful furnishings decorated throughout the bedroom.

He was going to live here. This was his bedroom.

No.

THEIR bedroom. Their kitchen, their garden, their bath...their home. A home on earth.

But it was more than that.

_Kazutaka..._

Rolling onto his side, he brushed back silver bangs from his lover's sleeping face. This house, though lovely and immense and expensive, wasn't the reason for this feeling of contentement and security and peacefullness.

Tsuzuki shook his head.

Even if Muraki wasn't a wealthy doctor and lived in a one-room apartment and was barely scraping by, Tsuzuki would still have these strong feelings that were based solely on one simple truth.

_I am in love with Muraki Kazutaka._

And that meant everything.

The doctor sighed deeply, a sign that he was coming back to the waking world...back to Tsuzuki. The guardian watched as silvers blinked into awareness.

Soon diamond eyes focused on Tsuzuki, the beautiful face alighting into a breathtaking smile.

Tsuzuki grinned back, leaning in to greet his lover with a kiss and embrace.

I'm home.

**OWAI**

* * *

A/N: OMG! I did it! I finished it! Many, many apologies for letting this go and taking waaaay too much time updating this. I cannot believe it took a month shy of a year to finish are no excuses. All I can give is explanations. My laptop went kaput; I had to scrimp and save to get a new one; I misplaced the flashdrive that I save my stories on...but, it doesn't matter. There aren't enough explanations.

Thanks to everyone who stuck by this one and wanted to see this conclude. I sure as hell didn't want to be one of those writers who do not finish their stories, thus, leaving readers upset. Nope. Not me. So, yeah, it took almost a year and I know some readers were put off and frustrated...but I did it! I promise never to let that happen again. You can rest assured that when I post something, it'll be seen through to the end AND not take a decade to update!

Plus, Muraki was pretty pissed at me for leaving him hanging like that. And Tsuzuki wasn't too happy either. But they've agreed to give me another chance. And so entrusted, I carry on.

*Bows* Until next time!


End file.
